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Bassoon

The best instrument EVER. It produces a dark, round, rich sound which is very unique, especially in the upper register.

Though it is extremely difficult at first, once you get the hang of using your thumbs more it gets easy; but it requires hours of practice and perseverance.

Not only that, but Colleges and Universities are always looking out for good Bassoonists because they earn very good scholarships and are usually very intelligent.

Number one rule to play Bassoon: You need to have a sense of humor. :)
Colin: I want to play the Trumpet.

Karen: Oh, please! Bassoon owns Trumpet.
by Fagotist December 18, 2009
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Bassoon

The world's coolest instrument. Sounds like a dying duck fart, unless you know how to play. Which I do, so boo-yah. Also, as I've been told many many many many times, it looks like a bong. OK, I get it, move on with your life already.
Random Guy: Hehe... did you know your instrument looks like a bong?

Me: yes, the past 5 people to walk past have said that. But that still doesn't mean you can put drugs in it, you disrespectful bassoon killer.
by Me April 20, 2005
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Bassooned

Consuming a large amount of alcohol, specifically beer and reaching a heroic state of inebriation whilst maintaining the appearance of functioning pleasantly in a social environment and constantly asking for cigarettes and beers.

Named from characteristics made famous by Johnny Basoon; the bassoon player and saxophonist from infamous melbourne based band Sex On Toast.
oh man, I'm gonna get bassooned tonight
by gunstreetgirl March 10, 2011
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meat bassoon

Old-musician slang for a dick.
Usually referenced as such when referring to oral sex.
"the first time I saw her,
she was playin' a tune,
in the orchestra pit,
on a MEAT bassoon."

copyright Doug Clark & hot nuts
by dave_CO February 6, 2007
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bassoon

A bassoon is a musical instument that some say looks like a bong. Traditionally, it's made of wood, but they can be made of this crappy plastic stuff. (plastic bassoons don't sound near as nice as the wooden ones.)

Bassoons produce a dark rich tone in the hands of an experienced player. However, anyone else sounds like they're killing a large beast.

Bassoons require a double reed.
He started playing bassoon last October and sounded terrible, but now he's great!
by Janetjet March 20, 2005
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bassoon

due to the nature of the instrument, bassoonists are quite good with their tongues.
Wow, you kiss like you play bassoon.
by satilo May 13, 2005
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Rusty Bassoon

While a woman is performing fellatio on a man she makes honking noises and gives him a raspberry at the same time. Both hands should be massaging any and all parts of the man.

If the man farts while the rusty bassoon is being performed, it makes it that much better.
After a symphony concert...

Man: Hey, you played great tonight! Put your good bassoon away, and come back to my place. I uh have a bassoon I want you to blow on. It's a rusty bassoon though...

Woman: Oh OK? So it needs to be cleaned?

Man: Why yes, it does.

Woman: Sounds great!
by rusty bassoon August 30, 2009
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