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masturbates furiously

man, masturbatesfuriously.com is stupid
by hat November 4, 2004
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Masturbaterade

Combination of Viagra, an energy drink, and a sports drink to help sustain performance during intense masturbation by giving the user an extreme erection, plenty of energy and the perfect amount of hydration. Stamina will increase and it will be possible to masturbate for hours.
My wife left me home for the weekend so I picked up some masturbaterade to use on Saturday night.
by Chubs McGahee July 4, 2012
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Masturbate

hi! every1 knows how to masturbate, but if you don’t.. here is how!
i’m a girl so this is written for girls!

take off your bottoms and undies, and rub small circles around your clit, if you want more, slam your fingers into your vagina. If that isn’t something you like, you can also keep your undies on, grab a pillow, if it has a zipper at the end where you can open the pillow, try putting something hard in there that you can rub your clit against! hope that helped!
if you are horny now, go masturbate! cuz now you know how :)
by ash! :) November 21, 2020
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masturbate text

A masturbate text is a text message sent out in the moments leading to a masturbation session. The text is sent in hopes of a quick response potentially leading to intercourse rather than self pleasure. If the recipient does not respond in a short period of time, it is acceptable to continue with the original plan to masturbate. This rarely works but is something worth trying on select occasions.
It was tuesday night and I was about to go to bed but I thought I'd masturbate before hand. I decided to send out a few masturbate texts to test the waters. I didn't receive an acceptable response within 45 seconds so I proceeded to masturbate.
by masterbate text December 27, 2009
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Masturbate

1. A long forgotten Karate teacher.

2. Self manipulation of the genitals in order to simulate sexual pleasure
Who the fuck would even consider going elite in the martial arts world if their surname is bate?

Wow, all the fun of sex anywhere, anytime. Might as well masturbate in class, I'm bored.
by SlangMangg August 30, 2009
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To Masturbate

An attempt to pointlessly satisfy an irrational urge in the short term.

(where in the long term on further reflection you realise it to be truly unsatisfactory)
"Sometimes I try to masturbate a really long or difficult word into a sentence just to feel I'm smarter than I actually am!"
by luriski January 14, 2021
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masturbate

All the slang words for masturbation: bashing the candle, Beat the meat, Bleeding the weasel, bleedin the weed, buffing the banana, bopping the baloney, burping the worm, choking the chicken, cleaning your rifle, corking the bat, cranking the shank, cuffing the carrot, fisting your mister, flogging your dog, floggin the frog, flogging the hog, flogging the log, flute solo, jerkin'the gherkin, looping the mule, manual override, painting the pickle, pocket pinball, pocket pool, polishing the banister, polishing the rocket, pounding your flounder, pumping the python, roping the pony, spanking the monkey, teasing the weasel, tossing the turkey, walking the dog, whipping the willy, wonking your cronker, yanking the crank.
Vote for the clit commander. and the clit will live on
by The clit commander March 12, 2005
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