Backwards Simping

Being rude, disorderly, disrespectful to women in order to gain power or attention from women in the hopes that the "nice guys finish last" and "women like assholes" myth will apply to them.

He hates Simps that cater to women so he'll start backwards simping because women don't deserve nice.

by Dallas AP August 4, 2021

Sideline Simping

When a girl you like is in a relationship, so you stay friends until she is available. That is when you tag in and shoot your shot.

Her: "We have been fighting recently so I don't know, we might break up."

You: "I hope you can work it out. Just be careful, Celtic is totally sideline simping."

by SmollYeti November 30, 2021

Shadow Simping

Simping for someone who is already in a relationship.

“Gus is a cool guy but he’s always shadow simping for Mike’s girl so I don’t really trust him.”

by Crazy Train McGraw January 20, 2022

Table Simping

The act of being submissive to a person simply because they bought a table at a nightclub. Typically occurs when a dude with daddy's money isn't funny or capable of speaking to women, so he spends $5-10k on a table and invites a hot girl with 30+ bodies to stand next to him at his table. The girl wears a slutty cocktail dress and the guy wears ripped light wash jeans, Yeezy's, a gold chain on the outside of his shirt, and a black t-shirt so tight it might as well be painted on. The entire concept is adjacent to prostitution. It's an easy way for beta men to fuck a whore without 'technically' paying for it.

"Hey friends, I was thinking of having a group dinner at my place this Thursday. Maybe cook up some chicken parm and sip some wine while we watch the sunset! Are you interested?"

"No, sorry, I'm going to see insert no-name DJ tonight. Steve from the Seaport is buying $1,500 bottles of shitty Tito's at a nightclub the size of my bedroom, so I'm gonna go table simping."

by artfuldodger69 August 19, 2022

SSS (Stop Simping September)

Do not simp in september, or you lose the challenge.

X:"Dude,is september, you can't simp, or you lose the SSS (Stop Simping September)!"

by erpiccionotto March 22, 2021

filthy simian

A sexual position where the female supports herself on her shoulders with her legs spread upward in a "V". The male likewise spreads his legs widely enough that each partner's respective reproductive organs are in close proximity to each other. The male bends his penis downward to penitrate the female. Once coupled, both parties deficate and procede to copulate.

I had the best weekend, but I now have a nasty rash from the filthy simian I performed with X.

by jgogs April 9, 2007

simian

The distant parents of the "Original Peoples".

by Anonymous August 22, 2003