douche canoe on the lazy river 

The laziest band douche of them all. A person who is such a douche they need a canoe to hold all the doucheness and at the same time is to lazy to get anything productive accomplished.

RN is a douche canoe on the lazy river. I am glad i'm not him

douche canoe on the lazy river by dtch lgnd September 2, 2015

Double Douche Canoe 

Someone who is up shits creek with a turd for a paddle yet takes no responsibility for their situation and find the need to blame everyone else for their predicament.

You're a real double douche canoe.

Double Douche Canoe by harlequinxx July 30, 2010

American douche canoe 

An American "douche canoe" is the finest of human beings. Riding above a sea of douche you humanity, an American douche canoe stays above the fray; poised, stately, noble. A true American hero

josh and tom always looked up to Adam, the ultimate American douche canoe. He was everything they wanted to be, but could never be. It was both amazing for them and very very sad.

American douche canoe by Italian Beaver August 19, 2017

Ska douche canoe 

Duh, bye ;like hello, is anybody home?Notifying the individual expressing verbage that your done, but trying to be abruptly absent. Gots to go. Tata for now.
Don’t ever contact me again. Speaking to someone who said something that was life threatening or unlogical, suggesting harm or dumb shit. And your opting out.

Guy: so are you looking for someone who actually is into responsibilities?
Chick: ska douche canoe

Guy #1: why don’t we hangout in the ice fishing spot, probably the tempature huh?
Guy #2: ska douche canoe

Ska douche canoe by DaughterofGod March 14, 2020

Dick douche canoe 

Asshole/Jerk

Karen was being a dick douche canoe and driving in the left lane.

Dick douche canoe by Willie June 11, 2021

two seater douche canoe 

One who is filled so much with douche that it would fit inside a two seater canoe.

That kid is the biggest kind of jerk. One might call him a two seater douche canoe

two seater douche canoe by SwagBadger August 28, 2012

Douch Canoe 

Possibly the largest form of douchness. When someone is being so shady that the common douch bag is unable to resolve.

What's Berts problem? I asked for supplies out of the warehouse but he is being such a douch canoe that he told me to fuck off.

Douch Canoe by cableguy7464 July 29, 2009