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absolutelystupidesttoolinalltexas

Ted Cruz. Term originally coined by Big Bird from Sesame St.
Ted Cruz is the absolutelystupidesttoolinalltexas.
by absolutelystupidesttool November 14, 2021
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Absolute solver

The Absolute Solver (also spelled "AbsoluteSolver") is a failsafe program from internet series “Murder drones” that seems to exist within all Disassembly Drones as an auto-repair initiative that takes control of their broken forms if they are damaged to the point where they cannot repair themselves. It's implied to be an overarching antagonist of Murder Drones, with one iteration serving as the main antagonist of "Heartbeat".

Following Serial Designation J's destruction from Uzi's Railgun, the Absolute Solver activates and creates Eldritch J. It then proceeded to kidnap the colony's Worker Drones using holograms to trick them and use their parts to create new material for J to be rebuilt from. However, it was later defeated by N after attempting to escape and imploded, reducing it to a black, floating orb.

Despite being a program supposedly exclusive to Disassembly Drones, its implied that the program can exist in Worker Drones as well under specific circumstances, with both Uzi Doorman and Doll displaying its symbol in their eye and also show specific traits such as Uzi's descent into sociopathy and Doll's desire to consume oil, implying a possible effect related to change in behavior.
Damn, the Absolute solver saved my life there… but now I gotta drink oil….
by cheesegameridk March 20, 2023
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Absolute Fucking Walnut

The best insult known to man. Used by Dick Beater McFingers
Patrick: Dude, I just hit Tom's grandma with my truck! Shit, bro!..

Tristan: You ABSOLUTE FUCKING WALNUT!!!
by Dick Beater McFingers May 7, 2015
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Absolute crappin'

Absolute crappin' - something that is very bad.

Created by Patrick May, a man who checked a Japanese chatroom. The Japanese people, although they spoke english well, had some unique and interesting grammar. It influenced Patrick's grammar, and he invented " absolute crappin' "
I'm having an absolute crappin' day.
----
I think this TV show is absolute crappin'.
by Patrick May September 4, 2004
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absolute reverence

When toasting a piece of bread it is left in longer than neccessary, and black burn marks form on the surface.
"Sunnuvabitch! Absolute Reverence has occurred upon my piece of toast."
by Masta Dave November 15, 2005
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Absolutely

Absolutely is a word used to make a sentance seem stronger. It is used to make things seem better and more extreme, and is used for both positive and negitive attitudes. The word refers to someone's opinion mostly.
Person 1: I think dictionaries and vocabulary is absolutely boring!
Person 2: No, it's absolutely fantastic!
by uggson March 30, 2015
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Absolute White

The palest color your skin can ever be. Normally corresponds to the color of your ass, boobs, and/or other body parts that never see the light of day. Widely understood to be a winter phenomenon; may be taken as a sure sign that it's time for spring to come and/or you need a damn vacation.
It's still January and I've already reached Absolute White. FML.
by I'mWithBeardy January 25, 2013
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