Salted Lighthouse

When a guy and a girl are having anal sex on the beach, the guy takes his poopy dick out and covers it in sand. He then proceeds to use the shit/sand mixture as lube.

Guy 1: Dude, I totally pulled a salted lighthouse on this girl the other day.
Guy 2: Shit man, you must have fucked up her vag pretty bad.

by Joey123098 November 1, 2008

Salted

To be completely and thoroughly intoxicated, as if for the first time. Salted defines the world of drunken hurt that awaits for a newb out for a binge with their friends. Rooted in the Rockies, it stems from the idea that an LDS person from Salt Lake City would not normally drink, so if you happen to convince them, they would go far over their heads and spend the rest of the night hugging the toilet.

Shit man, I can't believe Sara is drinking! She's getting completely salted tonight!

by KissKissBangBang77 November 23, 2010

Salted Nut Roll

After a long day of work, keep in mind it's 90 degrees outside, and you shit in the blue house at work. You are rushed so you only have time for a "one timer." You go home from work with some major "swamp ass" happenin and your old lady is feelin frisky! You drop trow and she wants to lick your anus! Nuff said!

Holy shit randy, it was hot yesterday! I went home and my woman was begging for a salted nut roll!

by Sweaty Crack! July 3, 2009

Salted The Land

To completely ravage a woman's genitals.

The destruction of one's vagina during intercourse.
The aftermath of an authentic pussy pounding that renders the vagina nearly useless.

Bob-"Hey, are you going to bang her?"
Jim-"Hopefully she will let me hit it."
Bob-"I wouldn't do that if I were you..."
Jim-"Why not?"
Bob-"I heard that Johnny salted the land when he last got the chance."
Jim-"Oh. Good call bro. That would be like throwing a hot dog down a hallway. Thanks."

by landsalter July 13, 2010

salted your kipper

ejaculating in your pants.

ew you just salted your kipper, while eddie danced provocatively.

by finchh fuckerr May 5, 2010

Salted Boat

A female who has an abundance of sex. i.e non virgin.

"Heather always has seamen on her boat. Her boat is totally salted."

A guy referring to a girl: "You could tell that girl has tons of experience. She definitely has a salted boat."

by Heather and Caitlin January 19, 2011

Stalled Interview

When you tug one off in a bathroom stall before a big interview to calm your nerves.

I threw my tie over my shoulder, pulled my shirt out of my pants, dropped trow and nutted one out. Stalled Interview at it's finest!

by Dollhands June 4, 2016