Pork Scotch trousers

Boring, sensible black trousers with flaps over the back pockets. Worn by fat security guards who go out with men in drag, these trousers send people to sleep just by looking at them.

What the hell is fatboy wearing?

Pork Scotch trousers. Boring aren't they? Its the flap that does it.

<snore>

by Flappy Dickwad May 18, 2009

Pork Scotch Talent

The amazing ability of Pork Scotch's to bore you to bloody death just by saying "hello" to you. If he ever sees that you are in his boring presence you must escape it immediately because if the boring, gay twat so much as looks you in the eye, you will drop to the floor and fall into a deep sleep. He has entered many talent shows and the reason he didn't win was because he knocked out all the judges when he got on the stage and said "Hello there I'm Max" while wearing his shades that make him look important. He thinks he knocks all the ladies out because he's 'drop dead gorgeous'.

Pork Scotch: Hello Alex.

Me: Please don't use the Pork Scotch Talent on me!

Pork Scotch: What Talent? I don't recall any Tal...

Me (snoring): snaaaaaagggghhhhh, wwwwhhhoooooo.

by Ednatoast Jeeganflipperwick May 28, 2009

Pork Crevice

Alternative description for Vagina. This particular vagina is usually extremely deep and very wide.

I couldn't fill Janine up, her snatch was like a pork crevice.

by FritzyBaby! April 20, 2008

PORK POCKET

very large female crotch

Jane is hoping her pork pocket gets action this weekend

by SHELLY BARNES May 12, 2007

pork a port

To jerk off and cum inside an empty pack of Newport cigarettes.

Charlie was so fucked up last night, man. After we finished smoking, he went into the bathroom and proceeded to Pork a Port.

by POOPYBUTTTT August 12, 2017

Pork Scotch

A short, stocky man with a shaved head. Close to pensionable age but believes himself to be young and with-it. Drives a small white van. He thinks its cool to cook food outside with his drag-act "girlfriend", believing that sharing a garlic bread at a green plastic table is all that is required for a barbecue. Also known as Mr Boring, Mr Ugly and The Arsehole.

Pork Scotch is a total twat
Its gay to wear a buffalo hat
Your girlfriend's really a man in drag
Your boring face makes people gag

by Benny Twadge April 18, 2009

Pork Scotch

A boring old man that has a shaved head where there is a bald spot at the top-back and the hair surrounding it is spirally. Pork Scotch is the name of the hairstyle but the bloke is called a Pork Scotch aswell.When the boring old bastard speaks to you, you feel suicidal with boredom. He wears a cowboy hat-shaped buffalo skin hat. He has terrible tast in clothing, he sits outside in the back garden and thinks its cool and fun to have a bbq evryday wearing a hawaiian-like shirt with horrible, boring shorts reading a paper with his wife that looks like a man in drag. Pork Scotch is also known as Mr Boring, Mr Ugly, and The Arsehole. His real name is Max (AKA Pork Scotch)

MONK: Look at The Arsehole. The clothes are terrible! Ugly, Ugly old bastard!
DAD: I know. Look, he´s sitting at the table in the garden with his back to us so we get a good view of the Pork Scotch

by Ednatoast Jeeganflipperwick April 26, 2009