Her name might sound basic, but the
woman who owns it is anything but. Tol enough to intimidate you but smol at heart; aka a giant cutie. Her style is always on point. Will kill you with kindness, but is also a taekwondo master who will not hesitate to round-house kick your butt into the sun if you cross her. An amazingly sweet, caring, and loyal friend who
will yeet you the best memes. Could bankrupt a tea shop with all the tea she spills. Practically a walking encyclopedia. Is insanely smort and a
jack-of-all trades (but sometimes has to resort to sucker-punching
math in the face when it refuses to cooperate with her). Works harder than your single
boomer grandma who raised 12 kids all on her own.
Don’t challenge her to a dance battle unless you wanna get curb-stomped. Once dubbed Trashley by her infamous arch rival Crispy; whether she
will embrace the title remains to be seen.
Person 1: I just woke up from a five year coma and everyone’s talking about quarantines and pandemics and I’m totally lost. What do I do?
Person 2: Go talk to Ashley man, she’ll catch you up on all the tea you missed.
You insulted Ashley’
s friends and her bae? No one can save you now, bro. You better
hope she shows you mercy and yeets you to the moon instead of the sun.