lumber liquidator 

noun • a manner of reference to a characteristically vitriolic bitch who is either possessive of the predisposition to, or who has previously undertaken the action of removing the male phallic organ, usually subsequent to becoming enraged and overcome by her own flippant and ungainly emotions, to the point of performing such a heinous and vengeful act. Furthermore, such dismemberment is usually accomplished via the utilization of a sharp object, or potentially one that is comparatively duller if the perpetrator desires for a more lengthy and torturous removal and later thrown into adjacent vegetation and/or woods in order to secure difficulty in locating the separated life-giving essence of the human race.

Also see peter eskeeter

Anthony: Awww shucks, that lumber liquidator Maggie done got me, looks like imma be stuck without my ween. Guess I’ll get back to sitting on my ass. Ueh ueh ueh

lumber liquidator by jellypuddinginmyanus42069 January 11, 2020

lumber jack

A person who works in the woods for a living.

Paul Bunyan was a lumber jack.

lumber jack by Mel Function September 5, 2003

lumber-jacking 

The highly disciplined art of simultaneously defecating and masturbating.

One thing Cliff really enjoys is a good lumber-jacking.

lumber-jacking by Douglas Thorneloe January 10, 2009

Lumber Jack

A chunky jolly fellow usual by the name LJ or chris.
Gets a buzz out of cutting down tree's then retreating to there dark lair where they drink stolen Booze and play on holographic phones.

guy:Hey look its the lumber jack
LJ: alreet
guy: Hint!
LJ: i love you.
guy: Go cut down trees

Lumber Jack by Mcpwnzorage September 24, 2009

Lumber Nuts 

hitting yourself in the nuts with your own hard on.

Tom, " Bro i just got a case of Lumber nuts."
Brian, " that sucks man."

Lumber Nuts by Bandana Raburn September 13, 2011

Lumber up 

The act of getting a penile erection.

'Hey Bob, this road kill... its still warm!'

'Time to lumber up boy!'

'Bob, this roadkill...its still warm!'
'Lumber up boy! Time to become a man!'

Lumber up by Bearforce1 December 17, 2014

Lumber-sexual 

One who identifies as flannel wearing hipster with a perfect beard and/or mustache with incredibly soft hands that have never held an axe, other than axe body spray.

While in Placerville Logan in his flannel, beard oil, American eagle ripped jeans and multiple rings was on a mission to find some gluten free tacos to enjoy, when someone called out "hey we don't take kindly to you lumber-sexual kinds around here!"

Lumber-sexual by Mr. C. Hustle June 30, 2021