assisted living 

A place to live where you don't have to do anything. You can nurses and stuff change your bed, do your laundry, and even cool your meals. You can eat free food without paying $50 for groceries and you can have a party every day. This is a place generally for old people, but it will be a great place for a college dormitory.

Old people: Yeah I get to play Bingo every day at the assisted living
College guy: Sweet, I don't have to do anything... these hot nurses can wipe my ass for me.

assisted living by Lil Duff June 4, 2008

Assistication 

When you're at a restaurant and you order a main course meal only to find that the size of the dish is too big for you to finish, you ask a friend to assisticate you.

A conjunction of the word "assist" and "mastication".

They finish off the meal you paid thirty bucks for so you don't waste your money.

Rebecca: "This burger is the size of my head. Paige, will you assisticate me?"
Paige: "This is too much assistication to ask for."

Assistication by pastrychefsniper January 27, 2010

Assiated 

(Adj.) Pertaining or related to the stupidity of the writer/speaker. Usually used after having read something very stupid or not thought out. No common sense involved.

"This has to be the most assiated, stupidly written bankruptcy questionnaire I have ever read"

Assiated by Tyler Earman October 26, 2005

Askististics

Your level of ass kising relative to others in your office or workgroup.

With the new boss coming Jon's level of askististics is going to be reset to zero with the new guy, so get ready for some major ass kissing.

Askististics by Brickprick January 18, 2011

Assistant Ninja 

Holds and sharpens the many long objects a ninja happens to carry

" Ah ye, assistant ninja ho' fo' u"

Assistant Ninja by Rah nigga May 13, 2005

Roadside Assistance

Warning: This move is recommended for masters ONLY!

The roadside assistance is a sexual move that needs a bit of preperation and good timeing to pull off. There are some guidlines to follow first.

1.You must be driving on Rt. 80
2.You must be driving in a 4-door sedan with your GirlFriend.
3.You must do this between the hours of 3:30pm - 9:00pm
4.You must pop your tire and manage not to hit any cars and pull off to the shoulder, unscathed.

After you pull off the the shoulder you call AAA (Triple-A). A few moments after you hang up the phone, you start to have sex with you GirlFriend. Once you and your girlfriend are about to climax (have to climax at the same time) you yell "TRIPLE A". At that exact moment the AAA guy has to come up and knock on the window and must reply "Yes?"

If you manage to pull this move off, you will be a god among men.

"So yeah, I was driving on 80 today, and I saw someone doing the roadside assistance, But then that damn cop had to ruin my fun by pulling me over for being stopped on the highway, trying to jack off to the couple."

Roadside Assistance by Kiji_Otori March 28, 2008

grown-assity 

the state of being a grown ass man.

"I'm a grown-ass man and I can do whatever I want." Even if the grown-assity is some fucked-upped-ness.

grown-assity by Sthpaw30 August 20, 2011