Definitions by mattdude

Uber 

A car service that is a lot better than a taxi cab. Drivers always have nice cars and the company will always make sure that you don't get fucked over. You download the app on your phone which you create an account that will have your debit card stored in. They just can't wait at the airport.

I took Uber to work while my car was in the shop.

Uber by Mattdude September 24, 2016

#knock #knock

What people post on Twitter when they possibly just swatted someone.

@poodlecorp #knock #knock

#knock #knock by Mattdude July 19, 2016

Aft 

A safer word for ass from the spongebob squarepants movie, because spongebob can't say ass.

There's going to be some serious aft kicking.

Aft by Mattdude May 18, 2016

white ass bitch 

Someone who is just really, really white. Example: Blond hair, blue eyes, only knows English.

There are way too many white ass bitches at this hockey game.

white ass bitch by Mattdude April 22, 2016

fight or flight

A level of stress where you decide whether to face the situation or just walk away.

I was at a meeting and my colleagues blamed me for something I didn't do. Now I'm deciding whether I should fight or flight.

fight or flight by Mattdude April 14, 2015

Fat-hundred pounds 

The point at which a person became so morbidly obese that a number cannot describe the weight. They're on an obesity scooter, they have many chins, and there are rolls in their rolls. They're really unsafe to be around because they might cause a sinkhole and avoid them in elevators.

Man: Dude, you have to do something soon; you gained fat-hundred pounds and you will die!
Obese guy: I just don't have the time to lose the weight, and besides, I just love fried foods and chocolate.
Man: You're such a dumbass, you still don't realize your problem.

Fat-hundred pounds by Mattdude October 27, 2014

wizard sleeve 

The foreskin that hangs over the head of your penis.

I have to go clean out my wizard sleeve

wizard sleeve by mattdude January 23, 2008