joseph blough's definitions

Ood

An alien slave race featured in Doctor Who. Oods exist in a hive, communicate with each other by telepathy and act as servants for humans. They are ugly motherfuckers - bald, weird eyes and tentacles protruding from their mouths. A small sphere is attached to their mouths to their human masters. They are mostly benevolent and loyal, but if the contract a sickness called “red-eye” syndrome their eyes turn red, they become murderous, and can turn humans into

Oods.

In the 44th century, a group of red-eyed Oods on a slave colony attacked a group of humans and turned their master into an Ood.

by joseph blough December 29, 2024

EOTA

An acronym for "explosion of the ass". Simply put, it's when a volatile mix of food is consumed, resulting in a combination of explosive diarrhea and an extended loud and particularly smelly fart. Imagine eating a combination of hot wings, pizza and greasy cheeseburgers and the negative effects on the digestive tract. EOTAs can also result in the destruction of underwear, forcing one to go "commando" for the remainder of the day.

Jack went out with his buddies and treated himself to twenty sliders, onion rings and fries and frozen custard. Shortly thereafter he made a beeline to the toilet, where he had a nuclear EOTA that rendered the rest room uninhabitable for a week.

by joseph blough June 12, 2021

The Xactletes

A condition where your face looks exactly like your ass

Man, that guy is butt ugly. He has a case of the Xactletes!

by joseph blough December 25, 2019

Rectal adventure

An act of climbing into the ass of a large person or animal, crawling through their digestive tract and eventually making their way out of the mouth.

Johnny started his rectal adventure when he inserted his head into the elephant’s butt and proceeded to crawl through a system of shit and acid until he was regurgitated out of the elephant’s mouth.

by joseph blough October 8, 2023

Cycraps

When you spread your ass cheeks for all the world to see and push out a turd part way so your ass looks like a cyclops with a big brown eye.

I felt a crap on deck so I decided to do a cycraps for my friends. They still have nightmares from it.

by joseph blough December 9, 2021

See The Northern Lights

Lighting your farts on fire. Inspired by Terrance and Philip from the South Park movie.

Terrance: Want to see the Northern Lights?
Philip: (lights fart with match and is engulfed in flames).
Terrance: You burned yourself to death by lighting your farts! Ah ha ha ha ha ha!

by joseph blough April 19, 2025

Starship Pooper

When you lay on your stomach and fire a crap out of your ass toward the sky.

Kirk was lying on his belly naked when he fired a Starship Pooper out his ass into outer space.

by joseph blough April 15, 2022