Definitions by joseph blough

Ahhsfache

An alternative pronunciation of “assface”, when you don’t want an assface to know you are calling them as such. Here the “c” in “assface” is pronounced “che”, as in Italian.

That guy Ryan looks like he has a butt for a head. But I don’t want to insult him, so I just refer to him as an ahhsfache.

Ahhsfache by joseph blough October 3, 2022

Starship Pooper 

When you lay on your stomach and fire a crap out of your ass toward the sky.

Kirk was lying on his belly naked when he fired a Starship Pooper out his ass into outer space.

Starship Pooper by joseph blough April 15, 2022

Fartronomy 

The scientific study of flatulence. A PhD in fartronomy is an expert in expulsions from the ass.

Donald likes to stick his nose in people’s asses to measure the density of farts. He has a PhD from Harvard in Fartronomy.

Fartronomy by joseph blough April 12, 2022

transverse digestion 

An unfortunate birth defect whereby one’s digestive tract is reversed, causing one to eat with their ass and crap out of their mouth. The ass must be trained to chew food in the same manner as teeth. A serious side effect of transverse digestion is halitosis.

Derek: “Hey Mike, how come you never eat with us?”
Mike: “I didn’t want you to watch me eat with my transverse digestion condition.”
Derek: “So THAT’S why your breath stinks like shit!”

transverse digestion by joseph blough April 8, 2022

What Can Brown Do For You? 

1) an ill-fated ad campaign for UPS.

2) it can come out of your ass to make you feel less full.

My stomach was gurgling and I felt so bloated. So I asked myself “what can brown do for you?” and proceeded to the nearest toilet to take a huge shit.

What Can Brown Do For You? by joseph blough March 31, 2022

Odor Eater 

1) a branded shoe insert designed to absorb foot odors from sweat
2) Someone who sucks in the farts of others with their mouth

“Tom was at a party when he unintentionally let loose a giant, smelly bout of flatulence, but fortunately Jeff the Odor Eater was there to ingest the gas and save the day”.

Odor Eater by joseph blough March 27, 2022

gasasstic flatulence 

A fart that is so explosive and smelly that it literally shakes the foundation of a building.

“Man, Joe just blew gasasstic flatulence so power and loud that the entire floor moved. No air freshener could remove the stench.”

gasasstic flatulence by joseph blough March 25, 2022