joseph blough's definitions

Gastric Bypass

1) a bariatric surgery performed for rapid weight loss on severely obese people.

2) A bariatric surgical mishap where the surgeon mistakenly connects your esophagus to your ass and you end up shitting and farting out of your mouth.

Steve had gastric bypass surgery last year. He’s lost 200 pounds and looks great, except for the fact that he now has to stick his head in the toilet to poop.

by joseph blough July 6, 2023

Starship Pooper

When you lay on your stomach and fire a crap out of your ass toward the sky.

Kirk was lying on his belly naked when he fired a Starship Pooper out his ass into outer space.

by joseph blough April 15, 2022

EOTA

An acronym for "explosion of the ass". Simply put, it's when a volatile mix of food is consumed, resulting in a combination of explosive diarrhea and an extended loud and particularly smelly fart. Imagine eating a combination of hot wings, pizza and greasy cheeseburgers and the negative effects on the digestive tract. EOTAs can also result in the destruction of underwear, forcing one to go "commando" for the remainder of the day.

Jack went out with his buddies and treated himself to twenty sliders, onion rings and fries and frozen custard. Shortly thereafter he made a beeline to the toilet, where he had a nuclear EOTA that rendered the rest room uninhabitable for a week.

by joseph blough June 12, 2021

Rectal adventure

An act of climbing into the ass of a large person or animal, crawling through their digestive tract and eventually making their way out of the mouth.

Johnny started his rectal adventure when he inserted his head into the elephant’s butt and proceeded to crawl through a system of shit and acid until he was regurgitated out of the elephant’s mouth.

by joseph blough October 8, 2023

Craptropolis

A large city that was once beautiful and safe that is now decrepit, crime-infested and contracting in population. A typical example would be Detroit, once the fifth largest city in America and now isn't even in the top 25. A craptropolis has hundreds of abandoned buildings, gang-infested streets, murders, robberies, carjackings, to name a few.

Hey man, wanna go to Chicago this weekend for some baseball and deep-dish?

No way man! Chicago is a Craptropolis and I don't want to get shot in the head!

by joseph blough October 20, 2022

See The Northern Lights

Lighting your farts on fire. Inspired by Terrance and Philip from the South Park movie.

Terrance: Want to see the Northern Lights?
Philip: (lights fart with match and is engulfed in flames).
Terrance: You burned yourself to death by lighting your farts! Ah ha ha ha ha ha!

by joseph blough April 19, 2025

Cycraps

When you spread your ass cheeks for all the world to see and push out a turd part way so your ass looks like a cyclops with a big brown eye.

I felt a crap on deck so I decided to do a cycraps for my friends. They still have nightmares from it.

by joseph blough December 9, 2021