77 definitions by Tee Cee Deez
A term used to describe a day that you try the same ridiculous sexual ideas with your partner, try to perform them, and your partner is so disenchanted with your shenanigans, decides to ground your hog for a period of time.
Every year on March 21st, I float some sexual ideas out to my wife to try in the bedroom. This year I didn’t, and as I was pounding away, I decided to do a little Rectum Rattling. I didn’t get an answer, which I thought was the brown light. As I started to pump her ass, she let out a hellacious scream, followed by a what the fuck, and then the words Happy Groundedhog Day asshole, for the 17th year in a row, your dick will be banished to the Hog House for who knows how long. I felt terrible, literally, I had blue balls for 3 days afterwards. Here we are in June and yeah, my hog is still grounded. Fucking devastating.
by Tee Cee Deez June 5, 2021
Is a term used to describe a dedicated individual, also at times called a servant, when it comes to all things that encompass the schlong.
I was absolutely obliterating Jenny when she had multiple orgasms and tapped out. Most girls would call it a night, but not my Schlong Servant Jenny. Jen grabbed ahold of my Esophagus Annihilater and got me to the promise land. That is some Dong dedication!
by Tee Cee Deez April 10, 2020
by Tee Cee Deez February 15, 2019
Candemic is a word used to describe the transmission of a sometimes lethal, sometimes mundane, worldwide virus by strictly having intercourse in the ass aka the can and upon transmission, unfortunately becomes ground zero for the pandemic.
I was talking to Cramer last week and apparently old dumper queef Keith is ground zero for the new flesh eating dong disease that has started to spread. I guess because its transmitted through anal sex he’s started a candemic!
by Tee Cee Deez March 13, 2020
Is an acronym which stands for
Oversized Cock Disorder, and describes an individual who is packing at least 10 inches
Oversized Cock Disorder, and describes an individual who is packing at least 10 inches
I was going to put the hurt on Donna last night until she informed me her last boyfriend had O.C.D. I said what’s the big deal about obsessive compulsive disorder, there are ways to handle it. She responded by saying there is no way to “handle” someone with OCD, then informed me it stands for Oversized Cock Disorder. I asked how big this dong was, and she informed me 12 inches hard. Needless to say, I would have to give it to her 6 times if she wanted 12 from this guy. Ouch!
by Tee Cee Deez April 9, 2020
You wouldn’t believe the things women say to me about my gigantic cock. As a matter of fact, I met this girl Renee on Saturday and as I dropped my trousers to unveil the Cadillac of dongs, she proceeded to tell me it was Horsedickulous! Completely taken aback by her comment, I asked if she was insulting me, to which she said no, your dick is so ridiculously big, it looks like it belongs on a horse. After delivering the Dong for what seemed to be an eternity, I bounced expecting to never see or hear from her again. I’ve ran across my fair share of women, but this Renee is a top of the line Horsedick Hound, and I’m a little worried she’s going to seriously injure me, or worse, cut off my meaty member and make a bronze replica. If you know a bodyguard for dongs, please contact me!
by Tee Cee Deez April 14, 2020
I was backed up severely and had tried every option I knew. My buddy Jeremy suggested a suppository, but I dated a girl who once stuck her finger in my ass and cut it severely due to her art of shitty Manicuring. I called my buddy Matt to see if her would put it in via Schlong, which he did and we decided to call it a Sclongpository. It felt better than I thought.
by Tee Cee Deez October 29, 2020