Smart American Male's definitions

Hayden Panettiere

A goddess of the creatures of the sea with an outgoing and friendly personality. She takes the form of an extremely attractive human who happens to be one of America's most successful movie actresses. She was a cheerleader during her years in school and has acted in many roles of cheerleaders in movies, but her most notable role is Claire Bennet from Heroes, where one of her unnecessary powers, regeneration, is put to use. The reason she has chosen the form of an attractive human is to draw the attention to build support to help keep alive her two groups of cohorts called the "Whales" and the "Dolphins", whether it's acting out as the spokesman for the Whaleman Foundation, making bold attempts to save fellow comrades from getting slaughtered personally, known as "Saving The World", or reaching out to her fans via the internet. Hayden is also a singer/songwriter, and her human boyfriend is Milo Ventimiglia, who also plays a character on Heroes.

Girl: My report is on Hayden Panettiere.
Boy: Who the hell's that?
Girl: Oh, she's an actress known as the "Cheerleader who wants to Save the World."
Boy: Pfft. Cheerleaders? Boring. Why not do one on Britney Spears?
Girl: ...Are you kidding me?! God I bet is laughing at you right now.

by Smart American Male June 3, 2008

graham cracker

An old person who tries to act cool.

Kid: Hey! Get a load of the graham cracker! Ahaha!
Man: Is that a geezer on a skateboard?!
Old Man: LOOGAME! WHEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Kid & Man together: A 360 Varial McTwist?!

by Smart American Male October 18, 2006

greasemo

A dirty old man; A overgreased slice of pizza; An oil changing expert

"Help! This greasemo from the alley tried to grab me!"

"Eww! This slice is a greasemo! Get me a napkin or something!"

"Damn! That car oil was fast! You greasemos are alright!"

by Smart American Male October 24, 2006

alcosexual

A man who is attracted to beer over women. It's a growing trend over the repetitive use of the idea in American beer ads.

Girl 1: Kelsie, help...
Girl 2: What's wrong?
Girl 1: They guy you hooked me up with, turns out he's pretty weird.
Girl 2: Is he a homosexual?
Girl 1: Worse. An alcosexual.

by Smart American Male June 6, 2010

numnah

1. a felt of sheepskin pad placed between a horse's back and the saddle to prevent chafing
2. a word used in the 2008 Spelling Bee which was confused with "numnut".

Announcer: "Numnah"
Speller: "Numnut?"... Oh! "Numnah"!

by Smart American Male June 3, 2008

Ashley Tisdale

A careful yet still overrated actress signed with Disney whose best friends are a giant tampon named Vanessa Hudgens and her bitch, Zac Efron. She has been a Disney Channel regular since about 3 years ago and ever since then, she's been a marketing ploy to teeny boppers everywhere. From a temporary singing career, and soon to be a temporary acting career, it's only a matter of time before she'll start to shit bricks. She also is in bad shape and has decided to put her health in the hand of plastic surgeons. Opposed to Hayden Panettiere, Ashley Tisdale is one of several Disney-born stars that don't really impress anybody but the media.

Girl: Could you believe Ashley Tisdale is redoing her nose AGAIN?! What the hell?
Boy: I heard it's to improve her singing, but let's hope they fuck it up so badly that she can't even breath. I'm so sick of hearing about her.

by Smart American Male June 2, 2008

Roger Clemens

Now a 45 year old attention whore, Clemens was once a great baseball player who has played for the Toronto Blue Jays, the Houston Astros, and the New York Yankees. As he got older he's become a roid freak to win back his long time boyfriend Brian McNamee. But it costed him his respect and fame.

Roger Clemens is too old. But he just won't give up.

by Smart American Male June 2, 2008