A careful yet still overrated actress signed with Disney whose best friends are a giant tampon named Vanessa Hudgens and her bitch, Zac Efron. She has been a Disney Channel regular since about 3 years ago and ever since then, she's been a marketing ploy to teeny boppers everywhere. From a temporary singing career, and soon to be a temporary acting career, it's only a matter of time before she'll start to shit bricks. She also is in bad shape and has decided to put her health in the hand of plastic surgeons. Opposed to Hayden Panettiere, Ashley Tisdale is one of several Disney-born stars that don't really impress anybody but the media.
Girl: Could you believe Ashley Tisdale is redoing her nose AGAIN?! What the hell?
Boy: I heard it's to improve her singing, but let's hope they fuck it up so badly that she can't even breath. I'm so sick of hearing about her.
Boy: I heard it's to improve her singing, but let's hope they fuck it up so badly that she can't even breath. I'm so sick of hearing about her.
by Smart American Male June 02, 2008
Get the Ashley Tisdalemug. A daily block of mini sports soap operas packed into one hour. Programs listed in order and the length of the episodes vary:
Yankee Country
Manny Knows Best
The Favre Saga
The Misadventures of T.O.
Lebrontourage
The Red Sox Chronicles (or sometimes a rerun of Yankee Country)
repeat the cycle until 2PM EST.
And check this, they leave women doing the morning shift.
Yankee Country
Manny Knows Best
The Favre Saga
The Misadventures of T.O.
Lebrontourage
The Red Sox Chronicles (or sometimes a rerun of Yankee Country)
repeat the cycle until 2PM EST.
And check this, they leave women doing the morning shift.
ESPN anchor: And still to come, we take a trip to Ben Roethlisberger's natural habitat at the Pittsburgh Zoo. Later, a rapper comes on stage! What the fuck does this have to do with sports? Who knows?! Don't tell us how to do our business, bitch! It's nawmally good!
Viewer: Man, even Sportscenter could use an offseason.
Viewer: Man, even Sportscenter could use an offseason.
by Smart American Male April 29, 2009
Get the Sportscentermug. Sluttiest children's special in television history. The abomination of awards shows and the most overrated.
Teens don't even watch. Children do.
It's not even their choice. The choice is Miley's and the Jonas Brothers'. And they suck.
Therefore, the awards are nothing but novelty.
Teens don't even watch. Children do.
It's not even their choice. The choice is Miley's and the Jonas Brothers'. And they suck.
Therefore, the awards are nothing but novelty.
by Smart American Male August 10, 2009
Get the Teen Choice Awardsmug. A goddess of the creatures of the sea with an outgoing and friendly personality. She takes the form of an extremely attractive human who happens to be one of America's most successful movie actresses. She was a cheerleader during her years in school and has acted in many roles of cheerleaders in movies, but her most notable role is Claire Bennet from Heroes, where one of her unnecessary powers, regeneration, is put to use. The reason she has chosen the form of an attractive human is to draw the attention to build support to help keep alive her two groups of cohorts called the "Whales" and the "Dolphins", whether it's acting out as the spokesman for the Whaleman Foundation, making bold attempts to save fellow comrades from getting slaughtered personally, known as "Saving The World", or reaching out to her fans via the internet. Hayden is also a singer/songwriter, and her human boyfriend is Milo Ventimiglia, who also plays a character on Heroes.
Girl: My report is on Hayden Panettiere.
Boy: Who the hell's that?
Girl: Oh, she's an actress known as the "Cheerleader who wants to Save the World."
Boy: Pfft. Cheerleaders? Boring. Why not do one on Britney Spears?
Girl: ...Are you kidding me?! God I bet is laughing at you right now.
Boy: Who the hell's that?
Girl: Oh, she's an actress known as the "Cheerleader who wants to Save the World."
Boy: Pfft. Cheerleaders? Boring. Why not do one on Britney Spears?
Girl: ...Are you kidding me?! God I bet is laughing at you right now.
by Smart American Male June 03, 2008
Get the Hayden Panettieremug. A man who is attracted to beer over women. It's a growing trend over the repetitive use of the idea in American beer ads.
Girl 1: Kelsie, help...
Girl 2: What's wrong?
Girl 1: They guy you hooked me up with, turns out he's pretty weird.
Girl 2: Is he a homosexual?
Girl 1: Worse. An alcosexual.
Girl 2: What's wrong?
Girl 1: They guy you hooked me up with, turns out he's pretty weird.
Girl 2: Is he a homosexual?
Girl 1: Worse. An alcosexual.
by Smart American Male June 06, 2010
Get the alcosexualmug. We'll let's just say she's nothing like a Disney Channel actress.
Let's look stuff up. Hands down Hayden is a far better dresser with a taste of a 30 year old. Whereas girls from Disney dress very skanky. Vanessa Hudgens always takes pictures with Hayden so she doesn't look bad. Well compared to her, she does, always. Hayden 1, Disney 0.
She actually started singing at a young age, can carry a note, and has won awards for songs in movies such as A Bug's Life. Today's Disney stars have no experience at singing but they do it anyway to get money and for people like girls and gays and shit to like them. Miley, Vanessa, Ashley, the Jonases, Demi, Selena, Zac? Pfft, do you see a pattern here? This just screams "marketing ploy", and their singing voices are used to kill terrorists. Hayden 2, Disney 0.
Speaking of marketing ploys, Hayden was offered a role in High School Musical. The smart decision was that she refused and did not want the burden of being a clingy attention whore, and would rather breakout as a big star when she turned an appropriate age and have a bright future ahead of her. The Disney actors either don't know how to count, or they are just spoiled brats who want everything now. In 3 years they will all go to rehab or jail or become washups. Hayden 3, Disney 0.
Hayden is also very down to earth, and puts people first over money or fame. She's also a spokeswoman for the Whaleman Foundation and once tried to stop whaling in person. She hopes to become the president of the organization when she retires. Disney? Pfft. Name one time they really went out of their way to help people. That Miley New Year's party was just a set up by MTV to get ratings. And the Jonases get paid for sponsoring the Salvation Army. So yeah name one time...I thought so. Hayden 4, Disney 0.
It's ironic to see that one 19 year old woman beats all of the Disney Channel (ages 14 - 23) in prestige, personality, and reputation. Plus she's hot!
Let's look stuff up. Hands down Hayden is a far better dresser with a taste of a 30 year old. Whereas girls from Disney dress very skanky. Vanessa Hudgens always takes pictures with Hayden so she doesn't look bad. Well compared to her, she does, always. Hayden 1, Disney 0.
She actually started singing at a young age, can carry a note, and has won awards for songs in movies such as A Bug's Life. Today's Disney stars have no experience at singing but they do it anyway to get money and for people like girls and gays and shit to like them. Miley, Vanessa, Ashley, the Jonases, Demi, Selena, Zac? Pfft, do you see a pattern here? This just screams "marketing ploy", and their singing voices are used to kill terrorists. Hayden 2, Disney 0.
Speaking of marketing ploys, Hayden was offered a role in High School Musical. The smart decision was that she refused and did not want the burden of being a clingy attention whore, and would rather breakout as a big star when she turned an appropriate age and have a bright future ahead of her. The Disney actors either don't know how to count, or they are just spoiled brats who want everything now. In 3 years they will all go to rehab or jail or become washups. Hayden 3, Disney 0.
Hayden is also very down to earth, and puts people first over money or fame. She's also a spokeswoman for the Whaleman Foundation and once tried to stop whaling in person. She hopes to become the president of the organization when she retires. Disney? Pfft. Name one time they really went out of their way to help people. That Miley New Year's party was just a set up by MTV to get ratings. And the Jonases get paid for sponsoring the Salvation Army. So yeah name one time...I thought so. Hayden 4, Disney 0.
It's ironic to see that one 19 year old woman beats all of the Disney Channel (ages 14 - 23) in prestige, personality, and reputation. Plus she's hot!
Vanessa Hudgens: HAYDEN! How have you been?! Like, my black slutty whore costume is gonna melt any minute. Can I get a picture with you again so I won't look like shit?
Hayden Panettiere: Does it matter? (Oh god why?)
Hayden Panettiere: Does it matter? (Oh god why?)
by Smart American Male January 18, 2009
Get the Hayden Panettieremug. Now a 45 year old attention whore, Clemens was once a great baseball player who has played for the Toronto Blue Jays, the Houston Astros, and the New York Yankees. As he got older he's become a roid freak to win back his long time boyfriend Brian McNamee. But it costed him his respect and fame.
by Smart American Male June 02, 2008
Get the Roger Clemensmug.