SPQR's definitions

pisslexia

A tendency to flush the toilet by mistake before one begins to urinate.

I'm not trying to waste water! I have pisslexia.

by SPQR April 25, 2006

holepocrite

A person who has body piercings or tattoos, but still professes to be afraid of needles.

The holepocrite at work has a pierced tongue and navel, but has been whining to us all morning about how much she dreads getting her flu shot.

by SPQR October 15, 2006

Calbino

A Calfornia girl without a tan.

Winona Ryder got that role in Beetle Juice because she's a Calbino.

by SPQR September 12, 2005

alcocommuting

Doing the most boring, mindless parts of your job drunk, off-the-clock, on your home computer, so you can reclaim the time fucking off at work, and yet convey the appearance of being efficient.

Policy and procedure updates? Attendance statistics? Put 'em on my alcocommuting to-do list.

by SPQR October 28, 2006

squish

Medical slang for a mammogram.

They found an abnormality on my squish, so they want me to get an ultrasound.

by SPQR October 29, 2006

tit mistress

A prostitute who limits her services to allowing her breasts to be fondled.

A tit mistress who works frat parties can make more in a night than in a week of waitressing.

by SPQR January 28, 2008

mombie

A listless, unaffectionate mother who tries to go through the motions of rearing the perfect child. Equals mom + zombie. She'd rather ask her kid what a participle is, instead of trying to savor a light moment.

The community center was full of mombies, who grilled their kids coldly on what they learned today in school in the 15 minutes wait before gymnastics class.

by SPQR November 12, 2007