Nuphagus's definitions

Turban myth

Urban legend that is popular in India

I heard that if you’re naughty, Ganesh, the elephant god, will come out of your cupboard and hoover your toys up his trunk. I think it’s just a turban myth.

by Nuphagus December 26, 2019

Corollavirus

Illness suffered by people who are sick of their old Toyota

I heard banging and swearing outside this morning. I looked out and Rex was smashing up his old Japanese motor with a sledgehammer! I reckon he’s got corollavirus!

by Nuphagus March 14, 2020

Greynus

Old person’s bumhole

I took the drinks trolley along the pensioners ward and when I leaned over to give mrs Cauliflower her tea, she pumped a right musty old stinker out her greynus! That’ll teach me for calling her an “old cow”.

by Nuphagus December 7, 2019

Godbeered

To be overtaken by a hulking, behemoth of a man running like a cheetah on rocket skates.

“I was doing about 60 on my GPZ the other night. I rode past some meatheads having a go at a woman. I heard some shouting and the next thing I know I’ve been Godbeered! This huge,Minotaur looking fella went legging it past me like a whippet on crack!”

by Nuphagus February 3, 2021

Trampax

A dead rodent used as a makeshift tampon.

Olga came on halfway through the hen do. We had a rummage through the bins for something she could use. She used a dead rat in the end. Talk about trampax.

by Nuphagus January 4, 2020

Jostlebot

Crappy homemade masterbating machine I.e pneumatically operated,mechanical Lego technic hand in a rubber glove.

I looked in quentin’s window the other day. He had a Henry hoover in a blonde wig and false eye lashes giving him a nosh! He said he was going home to test out his jostlebot!

by Nuphagus January 4, 2020

Drop the wogs off at the mosque

Have a poo

I’ve eaten too much. Where’s ya pan? I need to drop the wogs off at the mosque!

by Nuphagus January 4, 2020