I heard banging and swearing outside this morning. I looked out and Rex was smashing up his old Japanese motor with a sledgehammer! I reckon he’s got corollavirus!
by Nuphagus March 14, 2020
I heard that if you’re naughty, Ganesh, the elephant god, will come out of your cupboard and hoover your toys up his trunk. I think it’s just a turban myth.
by Nuphagus December 26, 2019
I said ‘Baywatch’ should be called ‘Gaywatch’ and that Mitch Buchanan was a big, curly haired tosspot and Herman stormed off in a Hasselhuff!
by Nuphagus January 05, 2020
Outta the way you lot! I’ve gotta get to the loo. I’m gonna pee my pants in about 5 seconds! I’m halfway through the urinal countdown!
by Nuphagus December 19, 2019
Get the Drop the wogs off at the mosque mug.
I said good morning to Clive three times this morning and even offered him a biscuit and he just grunted and took no notice. Then he got up farted and walked off. He’s autignorant!
by Nuphagus December 31, 2019
A big, fresh dog poo waiting just around a busy corner to ruin a poor, unsuspecting pedestrian’s day
I was out jogging in my brand new, white sneakers yesterday, turned into north street and went surfing on a massive turd of prey! I swear it was just waiting to ruin my trainers. I spent 5 hours cleaning cack out of the soles with my mum’s toothbrush!
by Nuphagus March 14, 2020