Maxhole's definitions

Halfgonistan

Halfgonistan (haf gon iss tan) NOUN. A country or place which has been half destroyed by war. From “half gone” and “Afghanistan.”

Dude, I lived in Richmond for a year, right across from the oil refinery that kept leaking poison gas. I saw junkies shooting up in my driveway, the landlord test-fired stolen guns in his living room and every Saturday night, automatic weapons fire. "BRAAAP BRAAAP!" "POP-POP-POP-POP!" "BOOM!" There was burned patch on our roof from a fucking Molotov Cocktail. It was like living in Halfgonistan.

by Maxhole June 20, 2009

payhole

payhole (pey hole) NOUN. A body orifice used to earn money, i.e. a mouth, vagina, anus, nostrils or ears.

Dick- Oh, stick it in your payhole, Jane.

Jane- Which one?

Dick- How many payholes do you have?

Jane- Seven.

Dick- WTF?! You do not!

Jane- (counting off her fingers.) Pussy is one, asshole is two, mouth is three, right ear is four, left ear is five, right nostril is six, left nostril makes seven.

Dick- How much do you charge for a nostrilfuck?

Jane- Right or left?

Dick- is there a difference?

Jane- Righty tighty, lefty loosey, as daddy used to say.

Dick- Your daddy is a sick fuck.

Jane- That must be why I'm with you, Dick.

Dick- You know how much I hate it when you're smarter than me.

Jane- OHHHH, so that's why you're always trying to fuck my brains out. And I thought you liked me.

Dick- Get real. I'm only with you because you give great nose. C'mere, you.

(snorting noises, laughter)

Dick- THAT WAS AWESOME!!!

Jane- I do what I can.

Dick- I want to take you home to meet Mom.

Jane- What's she like?

Dick- Well, her left nostril is a lot bigger than her right one...

by Maxhole June 22, 2009

homolester

homolester (ho mo les ter) NOUN. A person who enjoys bothering homosexuals.

Me- Why did you yell "faggot" at Mark?

Todd- Because I hate him.

Me- What did he ever do to you?

Todd- Nothing.

Me- So why bug him?

Todd- Because he's a queer.

Me- How do you even know?

Todd- I heard him on the phone with his boyfriend.

Me- Quit being such a homolester.

by Maxhole June 20, 2009

fudgeograph

fudgeograph (fudj og raf) NOUN. A faked photograph.
A picture that has been 'fudged' to alter it from its original appearance.

See that airbrush work on her cleavage? And how there's no wrinkles or creases at all? This isn't a photograph, it's been altered. It's a fudgeograph.

The Loch Ness monster just doesn't have tits like that.

by Maxhole June 20, 2009

congressmonkey

Congressmonkey (kon gres tard) NOUN. A member of the U.S. Congress noted for primitive beliefs and behavior.

Tom Tancredo was endorsed by the "pro white" Council for Conservative Citizens and Marilyn Musgrave was endorsed by the KKK. They want to jail all gays and illegal immigrants. These congressmonkeys are proof men descended from apes. And not very far, in some cases.

by Maxhole June 19, 2009

dodograph

dodograph (doh doh graf) NOUN. A stupid photograph, or a picture made using obsolete technology, such as Daguerrotype or Polaroid SX-70. From the extinct bird, "dodo" and "photograph."

I found a shot of my brother with his '70s hair, bell bottom jeans, a big, poofy down jacket and the best thing about it is that it's a genuine Polaroid dodograph.

by Maxhole June 19, 2009

strombie

A person who has had the life fucked out of them by Senator Strom Thurmond.

Poor Tunchie! She changed since young Master Strom caught her in the linen closet. I think he done turn her into a strombie.

by Maxhole July 15, 2011