79 definitions by Maxhole
Witless Protection Program (wit less pro tek shun pro gram) NOUN. An organization devoted to saving clueless people from the consequences of their stupidity.
Molly- Did you just threaten to kill the president?
Conrad- No, I said he's going to get shot.
Molly- How would you know?
Conrad- He's GOT to, nobody's going to stand for Obama giving a million dollars to every black person in the country!
Molly- What makes you think he's going to do that?
Conrad- Oh it's obvious. You know the way all those blacks work together.
(she scribbles something on a scrap of paper).
Molly- You are going to need this number.
Conrad- Who's this?
Molly- That's the number for the Witless Protection Program.
Conrad- No, I said he's going to get shot.
Molly- How would you know?
Conrad- He's GOT to, nobody's going to stand for Obama giving a million dollars to every black person in the country!
Molly- What makes you think he's going to do that?
Conrad- Oh it's obvious. You know the way all those blacks work together.
(she scribbles something on a scrap of paper).
Molly- You are going to need this number.
Conrad- Who's this?
Molly- That's the number for the Witless Protection Program.
by Maxhole June 25, 2009
slagnificent (slag nif iss ent) ADJECTIVE. The quality of being amazingly slutty and proud of it. From “slag” and “magnificent.”
A lotta gay guys I know are proud of how slutty they are. They strut around like peacocks because they are so slagnificent. As if it was hard to get some other gay guy to accept a blow job.
by Maxhole June 22, 2009
Friendefiner (fren deh fine er) NOUN. A person who keeps trying to make their friends names into words on Urban Dictionary.
How pussywhipped do you have to be to try to place your girlfriend's name in Urban Dictionary? "(Blank) is the most beautiful, wonderful, classy, smart and sexy woman in the world and the only woman for me," now THAT'S pussywhippped. What a friendefiner.
by Maxhole June 21, 2009
Babies and kittens are composed mainly of cutickles, a newly discovered subatomic particle with no weight and strong attractive power at short distances.
by Maxhole June 19, 2009
GOPbrain (gee oh pee brain) NOUN. A Republican who is a pinhead, cretin or moron. From "GOP", (Gay Old Party) and "peabrain."
by Maxhole June 21, 2009
Mom- Where are you going?
Calvin- Planet Spuzzbog, where there aren't any moms to ask me where I'm going!
Mom- Well, be back in time for supper.
Calvin- Uh, yeah, sure. Come on, Hobbes.
Hobbes- Doesn't she know that Spuzzbog is 20 light years away and by the time we get back, our faster-than-light drive's time-dilation effect will have rendered her a withered old crone while we only age a few hours?
Calvin- All I can say is she'd better have dinner ready. And it better not be cold.
Calvin- Planet Spuzzbog, where there aren't any moms to ask me where I'm going!
Mom- Well, be back in time for supper.
Calvin- Uh, yeah, sure. Come on, Hobbes.
Hobbes- Doesn't she know that Spuzzbog is 20 light years away and by the time we get back, our faster-than-light drive's time-dilation effect will have rendered her a withered old crone while we only age a few hours?
Calvin- All I can say is she'd better have dinner ready. And it better not be cold.
by Maxhole June 24, 2009
faithfool (faith fool) NOUN. A person whose beliefs are destructive to self and others, i.e., Crusaders, Jihadists, Fascists, Communists, etc. Fanatics who lie, cheat and kill for their god, in return for dubious heavenly rewards. From “faith” and “fool.”
by Maxhole June 20, 2009