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Maxhole's definitions

wadgitator

wadgitator (wadj et ate er) NOUN. A cute little troublemaker.
Bob- Who's the naked chick dancing on top of the cop car?
John- That's my sister. Lulu.

Bob- She's a good dancer.

John- She ought to be, she studied dance for six years.

Bob- So, what does she do for a living?

John- She's a professional wadgitator.

Bob- What's that?

John- People hire her to stage public disturbances and disrupt events and rallies.

Bob- So she's working right now?

John- No, she's just doing this for fun.

Bob- How come the cops aren't stopping her?

John- They sent someone to look for a blanket to cover her up. I don't think they're searching very hard.

Bob- No, I don't think they are. So, what's she like?

John- She gets away with SO much shit, just because she's little and cute.
by Maxhole June 24, 2009
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White House of Ill-Repute

White House of Ill-Repute NOUN (huite hows uv il re peut) NOUN. A White House (1600 Pennsylvania Av., Washington D.C.) which is filled with whores like James Guckert and Scott McClellan, who will say anything for money is a house of ill-repute, or whorehouse (see “presstitute”).
"Sit there with all the other presstitutes and suck up phony press releases and talking points? Fuck that. I'd rather be out in the field, or digging through dusty old archives than cover that dog-and-pony show. I don't wanna be a press correspondent in the White House of Ill-Repute."
by Maxhole June 24, 2009
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White Wing

White Wing (huit wing) NOUN. Wealthy caucasian conservative males who oppose all laws that would decrease their power.
It was revealed today that in 1925, Senator Strom Thurmond fathered an illegitimate daughter with a 15-year-old black housemaid. He kept the truth quiet for over 60 years as a strident supporter of segregation and opponent of civil rights laws. This kind of secret is a common occurrence in the Deep South, where the roots of the White Wing run deep.
by Maxhole June 24, 2009
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widgital

widgital (wi jit el) ADJECTIVE. The quality of small computerized devices. From “widget” and “digital.”
What should we get Lilly for graduation? How about something widgital, a video camera, or a computer or a navigation system?
by Maxhole June 24, 2009
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spadget

spadget (spad jet) NOUN. A surprising little gadget or creature.
Bro- Yaah! What the Hell!? A little animal just grabbed my ankle!
Sis- I see you met our Spadget.
Bro- He came out of nowhere!
Sis- That is his way.
Bro- Where'd he go?
Sis- One does not question the ways of the Spadget.
Bro- Why are you talking that way?
Sis- What way am I talking?
Bro- Like everything is some big mystical experience.
Sis- Oh. Sorry. It's just the way we talk about him here.
Bro- WHY?
Sis- We don't know where he came from, where he goes to sleep, what he eats, or if he's feral or somebody's pet that went wild.
Bro- Fucking thing could have rabies. Am I bleeding?
Sis- No.
Bro- You didn't even look!
Sis- He never breaks the skin.
Bro- Well, he's not wild, then. That's good.
Sis- We tried to catch him to take him to a vet to get him his vaccinations. Every time, we'd come out in the morning to find the bait gone and the trap empty.
Bro- Cool! So he's smart.
Sis- He's a furry little Einstein.
Bro- C'mere... Come here, little guy... Spadget... Spadgie-wadgie...
Sis- Oh, he doesn't come when you call.
Bro- Here, Spadgie... here boy... Want some beef jerky?
Sis- He's not going to come. He doesn't know you're calling his name... Oh my... what the fuck?
Bro- What a GOOD BOYYY...
Sis- Oh my gaw... WE HAVE BEEN OFFERING HIM ALL KINDS OF FOOD FOR THREE YEARS! And you've got him eating out of your hand!
Bro- Did you try beef jerky?
Sis- Yes, we tried EVERYTHING.
Bro- Even teriyaki flavor? Oh look, he likes having his belly scratched.
Sis- He's never even let me touch him! He never lets ANYONE touch him!
Bro- He's making little trilling sounds. Shhh. I think he's falling asleep.
Sis- I don't believe it. How did you get him to come out?
Bro- One does not question the ways of The Spadget.
Sis- Asshole.
by Maxhole June 24, 2009
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smartickle

smartickle (smar tih kul) NOUN. A particle of smartness, or intelligence.
In the bestiary of subatomic particles, none is faster than the smartickle. This weightless, inertialess positively charged unit of energy is so fast, it only exists in the future. It is always leaving us behind.

They can be found in large quantities near preschools, but the number of smartickles steadily decreases at schools until graduation from college, when the level reaches zero.
by Maxhole June 23, 2009
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smegzecutive

smegzecutive (smeg zek yu tiv) NOUN. An especially sleazy businessman. From “smegma” and “executive.”
From 2001 to 2008, Tim Geithner, Ben Bernanke, Alan Greenspan and Henry Paulson helped to destroy the banking, insurance, mortgage and loan industries. In doing so, they have ruined millions of lives and wrecked the world economy.

Instead of jailing them, President Obama picked them to fix the nation's economy. They chose to give their old bosses and buddies trillions of taxpayer dollars with no strings attached. It was a smegzecutive decision.

The world's economy is still a stagnant swamp because the billionaires are hoarding the free money, and will continue to do so until prices have dropped low enough for them to buy everything of value.
by Maxhole June 23, 2009
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