Madmann 's definitions
A black fly in your Chardonnay? How is that, Alanis? And isn't it moronic... don't ya think?
It's ironic that the song "Ironic" contains no irony.
It's ironic that the song "Ironic" contains no irony.
by Madmann October 10, 2005
Get the Ironymug. A sudden shift in belief systems (usually finding Jesus, but also Allah and probably every other Deity) after a period of incarceration. Usually a ploy for leniency with the legal system. Oddly, given the separation of church and state that we're supposed to have in this country, it does sometimes seem to have a positive effect when going to talk to the judge/parole board. Everyone from your local meth dealer to Manuel Noriega, Dictator of Panama have tried this one, making it one of the truly "oldest ones in the book".
typical jailhouse conversion:
Crack Dealer: Your Honor, I found Jesus in the Dade County Jail.
Judge: Big deal, this is Florida, every third guy in there is named Jesus....
Crack Dealer: Your Honor, I found Jesus in the Dade County Jail.
Judge: Big deal, this is Florida, every third guy in there is named Jesus....
by Madmann October 10, 2005
Get the jailhouse conversionmug. 1. The preferred state for most minorities and Democrats by the Republican party.
2. The lack of morals exhibited by the old men and oil companies who run the economy.
3. Having enough money for weed but none for lighters or rolling papers.
4. The vow taken by members of the Roman Catholic Church (you know them, right? Biggest land-owners on the planet?)
2. The lack of morals exhibited by the old men and oil companies who run the economy.
3. Having enough money for weed but none for lighters or rolling papers.
4. The vow taken by members of the Roman Catholic Church (you know them, right? Biggest land-owners on the planet?)
syn: bullshit
1. The Republican view towards poverty is bullshit.
2. Running away with all the fuckin' money, leaving everyone else in poverty, is bullshit!
3. Oh man... where's a pop can and two twigs to rub together? Poverty is Bullshit!
4. Those rich assholes don't pay taxes just because they wear dresses and chant? Vow of poverty, my ass... That's complete BULLSHIT!
1. The Republican view towards poverty is bullshit.
2. Running away with all the fuckin' money, leaving everyone else in poverty, is bullshit!
3. Oh man... where's a pop can and two twigs to rub together? Poverty is Bullshit!
4. Those rich assholes don't pay taxes just because they wear dresses and chant? Vow of poverty, my ass... That's complete BULLSHIT!
by Madmann October 10, 2005
Get the povertymug. syn. buddy jesus
1. Originally from the Kevin Smith movie "Dogma". In the film, Cardinal Glick, during his "Catholicism WOW!" campaign to move the church towards a younger, "hipper" demographic, suggest replacing the crucifix with a new image of Christ. This version is grinning like an infomercial host, with one hand thumbs up and one hand doing a phony Hollywood "Bang-bang" gesture. Imagine Jesus if he were subject to Neilsen ratings.
2. Anyone who possesses all the false charm and lack of genuine quality as personified by the icon represented in definition 1; for example, that phony cockbite where you work. It helps if they walk around all the time acting like only THEY can save you/the corporation/Earth/Jimmy Olsen. Martyrdom: It's a good gig if you can get it.
1. Originally from the Kevin Smith movie "Dogma". In the film, Cardinal Glick, during his "Catholicism WOW!" campaign to move the church towards a younger, "hipper" demographic, suggest replacing the crucifix with a new image of Christ. This version is grinning like an infomercial host, with one hand thumbs up and one hand doing a phony Hollywood "Bang-bang" gesture. Imagine Jesus if he were subject to Neilsen ratings.
2. Anyone who possesses all the false charm and lack of genuine quality as personified by the icon represented in definition 1; for example, that phony cockbite where you work. It helps if they walk around all the time acting like only THEY can save you/the corporation/Earth/Jimmy Olsen. Martyrdom: It's a good gig if you can get it.
1. I laughed so hard the first time I saw Buddy Christ I passed an entire chef salad through my nose!
2. That dude... he's such a Buddy Christ... I oughta nail him to something.
Source: Madmann, Oregon
2. That dude... he's such a Buddy Christ... I oughta nail him to something.
Source: Madmann, Oregon
by Madmann October 7, 2005
Get the buddy christmug. The electronic equivalent of a "paper trail". In the old days, guys like Enron and MCI had to worry about leaving hard-copy memos and such laying around that could eventually be used against them. Now it's e-mails, text files, server databases and the like.
by Madmann December 28, 2005
Get the vapor trailmug. It's when chef Gordon Elliott, through years of discipline and training, is able to actually urinate a meaty broth for the guests of his... oh wait... nope, that's pee soup. Sorry. Never mind.
by Madmann October 10, 2005
Get the pea soupmug. The only true sign of intelligence you will encounter from another human being.
A theist, or believer in God, will tell you that he ABSOLUTELY exists. An atheist (non-believer) will say he ABSOLUTELY doesn't.
Well, the last time I checked, it's been like 2000 years since God was reported to have talked to anybody, making it pretty difficult to prove. Besides which, all religion is predicated on faith (See also: Not supposed to be proven).
Prove he doesn't exist? Possibly the only thing harder to do. Besides the enormity of the task, there's the fact that anyone who ever took a logic class knows and that is that you can't prove a negative. You can only prove (sometimes) that something hasn't happened YET. It may still the next time.
So... you have a theist, an atheist and an agnostic... None of them really knows the truth about the nature of existence.
But only the agnostic is smart enough to admit it.
A theist, or believer in God, will tell you that he ABSOLUTELY exists. An atheist (non-believer) will say he ABSOLUTELY doesn't.
Well, the last time I checked, it's been like 2000 years since God was reported to have talked to anybody, making it pretty difficult to prove. Besides which, all religion is predicated on faith (See also: Not supposed to be proven).
Prove he doesn't exist? Possibly the only thing harder to do. Besides the enormity of the task, there's the fact that anyone who ever took a logic class knows and that is that you can't prove a negative. You can only prove (sometimes) that something hasn't happened YET. It may still the next time.
So... you have a theist, an atheist and an agnostic... None of them really knows the truth about the nature of existence.
But only the agnostic is smart enough to admit it.
by Madmann October 10, 2005
Get the Agnosticismmug.