Carty Field Linebacker

Lives in the trees. Comes down to make
plays and deliver big, violent hits that
have left many children in wheelchairs.
Problem is he's a linebacker…and this is
a baseball field. What's the resolution?

Son: hey dad can we take batting
practice down at Carty Field?

Father: Do you like being able to walk?
The Carty Field Linebacker would eat
you alive.

by Leland Bruce January 31, 2023

Wet Shack

All the walls are wet. The food is great. The staff is friendly. They are also wet. A restaurant where you can get wet? And it looks like a shack? That is what lies behind the doors of this infamous family owned establishment. Take a date there and you are sure to get some back seat lovin’…hell we’ve seen a couple of dudes playing butt hole tag on the front lawn after a hefty meal. We won’t call the cops on ya! Come on down. Bring your wettest attitude. You’ll love it.

Tracy: I’m starving. But I also wanna get wet too!

Kevin: Let’s go to the wet shack. We can get wet and eat some burger sandwiches. Sex after will be like jungle love.

Tracy: I cannot wait!

by Leland Bruce February 03, 2023

Sidewinder Joseph

One of the greatest pitchers of the early 1900s. Born in Brownsville, Arkansas this hefty thick thighed left hander amassed over 342 wins in his career while striking out 2,231. Known for his infamous “sidewinding” technique, Mr. Joseph also saw success off the field as well taking home an astounding 14,532 women during his playing days. Learning to pitch from his father who was a horrible alcoholic and goat farmer, Joseph was able to use the beatings given by his father to strengthen his core thus giving him a competitive advantage. Dying of untreated Gonorrhea in 1932 Joseph’s legacy still lives on today throughout the deep southern lands of this great country.

Waylan: Who’s your favorite ball player Bucky?

Bucky: Sidewinder Joseph. He loves women more than ball playin’ but that’s alright.

by Leland Bruce February 05, 2023

Butt Fucking a Pussy

When she asks you to go inside her vagina and treat it like a butt hole.

Ashford: Hey man what do you know about Butt Fucking a Pussy…?

Braylon: I’ve only done it 14 times. You have to really throw your weight around and make sure to save up a behemoth load.

Ashford: Yeah okay that makes sense uncle Braylon. Let’s just hope I can throttle some flesh

Braylon: Good luck nephew. Make sure you break a sweat.

by Leland Bruce September 09, 2023

Slutty Jeremy

The friend you know that lays pipe and never pulls out because he’s so horny and such a slut.

Brad: Dude I think I might do it tonight.

Kyle: Do what?

Brad: Act like a total Slutty Jeremy. I’ve been jonesing for a creampie.

Kyle: Gnarly!

by Leland Bruce January 24, 2023

bulance

Shortened form of Ambulance.

Rex: Yo bro Harry just got jacked up on the half pipe. His leg bone is where his arm bone used to be.

Dexter: Call the bulance man! There’s no time to be touching each other!

by Leland Bruce February 03, 2023

junkyard ho

A thick bitch with a fat ass and a lot of issues. Her face looks like Quasimodo and she lives on the bad side of town.

Torrance: Yo homie what are you doing with that chick?

Latrell: She suck the paint off it suhhn

Torrance: Yeah…cause she a junkyard ho. She always goblin’ on some meat.

Latrell: DAYUMMM. WARN A BROTHA NEXT TIME SUHHHHHNNN.

by Leland Bruce January 24, 2023