Jeffrey Douglas's definitions
The best thing to do when you are dumped by your girlfriend. go out and pull an old bird. the game consists of a pack of young males who attempt to shag the brains out of an attractive OLDER woman. Fuelled by booze these young males are letting themselves in for months of ribbing. Another problem is; when on boxing day, this one night stand turns up and is your mum's best friend, or dad's ex.
Alternatively, grab-a-granny could mean mugging a female pensioner.
Alternatively, grab-a-granny could mean mugging a female pensioner.
Mark: "Oh no, i'm crushed. My janine has dumped me. Oh, woe is me."
Keith: "No worries bud. We're out tonight and we'll partake in grab-a-granny"
OR
Baz: "I need some cash for some crack and a whore."
Bez: "Ok, let's grab-a-granny, and claim it was noel edmonds."
Keith: "No worries bud. We're out tonight and we'll partake in grab-a-granny"
OR
Baz: "I need some cash for some crack and a whore."
Bez: "Ok, let's grab-a-granny, and claim it was noel edmonds."
by Jeffrey Douglas November 24, 2006
Get the grab-a-granny mug.mad for it is a condition suffered exclusively in the greater manchester region. Becoming mad for it often stems from over-excitement from listening to the happy mondays or stone roses. Being mad for it means something similar to a state of excited anticipation. The after effects of being mad for it are hangovers, a sausage sellotaped to one's neck and a really ugly bird who is the cousin of John Squire. apparantly.
by Jeffrey Douglas November 15, 2006
Get the mad for it mug.Windy. So windy in fact, that many hazards arise in 'blustery' conditions. Such hazards include windswept appearances, missing pieces of clothes from the washing lines and cold ears.
Used solely in the north so hardened grizzly northerners can talk about their constant struggle against the evils of blustery days.
Used solely in the north so hardened grizzly northerners can talk about their constant struggle against the evils of blustery days.
A day in the north was very windy,.....
John: "By heck, it in't half blustery out there'
Harry: "Aye, blowin' a bastardin' gale"
John: "By heck, it in't half blustery out there'
Harry: "Aye, blowin' a bastardin' gale"
by Jeffrey Douglas November 5, 2006
Get the blustery mug.1) description of a task that requeires (too) much effort to complete.
2) description of a customer who breaks your balls making you do whatever they want and still leaving unsatisfied.
2) description of a customer who breaks your balls making you do whatever they want and still leaving unsatisfied.
1)
" I was shagging that bird over from Hull last night, and it was only when i looked at her face i realised it was too much hard work. "
2)
" Jesus, he was hard work. Comes in here, asks for a pizza, with a pasta bake for a topping and a tiramusu for a side. And this is a Fish & Chip shop! Twat.
" I was shagging that bird over from Hull last night, and it was only when i looked at her face i realised it was too much hard work. "
2)
" Jesus, he was hard work. Comes in here, asks for a pizza, with a pasta bake for a topping and a tiramusu for a side. And this is a Fish & Chip shop! Twat.
by Jeffrey Douglas December 12, 2008
Get the hard work mug.Henry: "Oh adam you've dropped that frisbee again you f*****g wonky bollock bastard"
Adam: "i really am a wonky bollocks minge"
Adam: "i really am a wonky bollocks minge"
by Jeffrey Douglas September 13, 2006
Get the wonky bollocks mug.A time where the chance for action (usually, but not always, sexual in nature) arises. When one sees such a chance, one must grab it (or, if you will, jump through the window of opportunity).
1. The Sexual Window of Opportunity. . .
Where one comes across a girl drinking a pint, and casually slips her a tab of rohypnol, thus creating a window of opportunity for easy sex later.
2. The non-Sexual Window of Opportunity. . .
Where one sees and old lady struggling with heavy shopping, the window of opportunity arises to help her. Remove a baguette, whack her over the head, and take her purse and sausages.
Where one comes across a girl drinking a pint, and casually slips her a tab of rohypnol, thus creating a window of opportunity for easy sex later.
2. The non-Sexual Window of Opportunity. . .
Where one sees and old lady struggling with heavy shopping, the window of opportunity arises to help her. Remove a baguette, whack her over the head, and take her purse and sausages.
by Jeffrey Douglas February 1, 2007
Get the window of opportunity mug.A tip off is a handy piece of information given by one to another. Tip-offs have been used in history (see the examples).
Regular tip-off;
"Look out Bill, he's a Queer."
Historical tip-off;
"Look, here, Hitler has said Peace in our time!"
"Nah, bollocks nev, he's a Queer."
"Look out Bill, he's a Queer."
Historical tip-off;
"Look, here, Hitler has said Peace in our time!"
"Nah, bollocks nev, he's a Queer."
by Jeffrey Douglas November 23, 2006
Get the tip-off mug.