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Definitions by Cap'n Bullmoose

Junior Psychologist 

A liberal twit who always knows the deep psychological reasons behind other peoples' beliefs and behaviors. Junior Psychologists come out of their holes to make their pronouncements in college dormatories, in letters to the editor, and in discussions. Like all liberal twits, Junior Psychologists know what is best for you and me, and never miss an opportunity to tell us so.
Fenton is a Junior Psychologist. She knows -- she absolutely KNOWS! -- that all men who drive four-wheel-drive vehicles do so because they subconsciously worry that their penises are not large enough. They buy four-wheel-drives to display as a large penis substitute. She can't conceive of a man -- or woman -- who wants a four-wheel-drive vehicle to explore the wondrous outback of America.

Fenton knows -- she absolutely KNOWS! -- that all men who do not vote for Quean Hillary do so because they are misogynist, sexist pigs and would feel emasculated if a woman was their leader. She can't imagine that their are 72 million women better-qualified to be President than Quean Hillary, and that most men would vote for one of them.

Fenton knows -- she absolutely KNOWS! -- that all men who own guns do so because they subconsciously fear that their penises are not long enough. They buy guns to substitute for a short penis. She can't imagine that men -- and also women -- own guns to hunt, and to shoot targets, beer cans, greasy-haired Pachuco Boys, and wimpy-ass liberals who want to take their rights away.

Fenton knows -- she absolutely KNOWS! -- that all men who are not limp-wristed liberal mush wimps are not because they "have issues" (as she likes to say) with having their bottoms wiped the wrong way when they were infants. She can't imagine that some people do not like paying taxes for sissy liberal social programs, socialist medicine, towing the politically correct party line, or being forced to tolerate the putrid behavior of A-Rabs, panhandlers, and mincing poofters.

Fenton knows -- she absolutely KNOWS! -- that men who do not like poofters are subconsciously afraid of their own hidden homosexual feelings. She can't imagine that any people are real men who are attracted to women and who find mincing, prancing, doing dangle dances, playing circle jerk, corn holing, and squealing "weeee" to be insipid, disgusting, perverted, and nasty.

Fenton knows -- she absolutely KNOWS! -- that men who do not like Greasy Haired Pachucos challenging them when they walk down the sidewalk have unresolved authority issues and harbor deep-seated racial hatred for people with dark hair and brown eyes. She can't conceive of a man who will defend his right to walk in public without being challenged by a greasy punk.

Fenton, as you can see, knows absolutely nothing. She is nothing but an arrogant, whining, snot-nosed liberal soccer mom who doesn't know Jack Shit.
What working stiffs do to their guns and their religion. We know this is true because that limp-wristed liberal stove lid, Barack O'Bama, AKA the Irish Jig, told us so.
That Irish Jig O'Bama says we working stiffs cling to our guns and our religion because we are too stupid and ignorant to be limp-wristed liberals. Actually, we cling to our guns and our religion because we are too smart to be limp-wristed liberals.

I'm not going to that dumb-ass liberal meeting. They won't let me cling to my gun in there.
Cling by Cap'n Bullmoose April 19, 2008
A male person who wants to vote for Quean Hillary.

A male person who wants Quean Hillary to tell him what to do and when to do it, and how much money to pay in taxes to support mexicans and colored guys.

A male person who wants Quean Hillary to make his children wards of the state.
Trent is a big sissy. He wants Quean Hillary to be president. He wants her to tell him when he may wipe is arse. He wants his kids to be wards of the state and raised in a Quean Hillary Village.
Sissy by Cap'n Bullmoose April 19, 2008

ass hole 

An orifice that ladies and gentlemen use to take dumps and blow binderfenders.

An orifice that a poofter uses like a lollipop.
Miss Livingston looked both ways, then blew a binderfender out of her ass hole, which frightened all the birds from the trees. Miss Livingston said "Oh, dear."

Trent the corn-holing poofter licked Creighton's ass hole like it was a chocolate ice cream cone. Then he licked his chops and said, "Oh, how tasty."
ass hole by Cap'n Bullmoose April 4, 2008

splooie contest 

A game, played by butt eating faggots, where a group of poofters all flong their dongs at the same time. First one finished is the winner.
Talbert, Winthrop, Swinburne, and Bruce had a splooie contest in the park, right next to the duck pond. Winthrop won.
splooie contest by Cap'n Bullmoose November 23, 2007

Tap your Log

To beat your pud. That thing that faggots do in a group on Saturday afternoons in the park.
Percival and Lemony agree that the park is a fine place to tap your log.
Tap your Log by Cap'n Bullmoose November 23, 2007

beat your pud 

If you would like to beat your pud with a group of fine liberal gentlemen, go play circle jerk with a bunch of corn holing, butt eating faggots. Poofters love to help you beat your pud
beat your pud by Cap'n Bullmoose November 22, 2007