47 definition by 1069

1. One of the most popular swear/cuss/curse words/profanities

2. another word Feces. Poop. Dookie. Scheisse. Poo Poo. Brownies.

The Shit List:

The Ghost Shit
The kind where you feel shit come out, see shit on the toilet paper, but there's no shit in the bowl.

The Clean Shit
The kind where you feel shit come out, see shit in the bowl, but there's no shit on the toilet paper.

The Wet Shit
You wipe your ass fifty times and it still feels unwiped. So you end up putting toilet paper between your ass and your underwear so you don't ruin them with those dreadful skid marks.

The Second Wave Shit
This shit happens when you've finished, your pants are up to your knees, and you suddenly realize you have to shit some more.

The Brain Hemorrahage Through Your Nose Shit
Also known as "Pop a Vein in Your Forehead Shit". You have to strain so much to get it out that you turn purple and practically have a stroke.

The Corn Shit
No explanation necessary.

The Lincoln Log Shit
The kind of shit that's so enormous you're afraid to flush it down without first breaking it up into little pieces with the toilet brush.

The Nororius Drinker Shit
The kind of shit you have the morning after a long night of drinking. It's most noticeable trait is the tread mark left on the bottom of the toilet bowl after you flush.

The "Gee, I Really Wish I Could Shit" Shit
The kind where you want to shit, but even after straining your guts out, all you can do is sit on the toilet, cramped and farting.

The Wet Cheeks Shit
Also known as the "Power Dump". That's the kind that comes out of your ass so fast that your butt cheeks get splashed with the toilet water.

The Liquid Shit
That's the kind where yellowish-brown liquid shoots out of your butt, splashes all over the side of the toilet bowl and, at the same time, chronically burns your tender poop-chute.

The Mexican Food Shit
A class all on its own.

The Crowd Pleaser
This shit is so intriguing in size and/or appearance that you have to show it to someone before flushing.

The Mood Enhancer
This shit occurs after a lengthy period of constipation, thereby allowing you to be your old self again.

The Ritual
This shit occurs at the same time each day and is accomplished with the aid of a newspaper.

The Guinness Book Of Records Shit
A shit so noteworthy it should be recorded for future generations.

The Aftershock Shit
This shit has an odour so powerful than anyone entering the vicinity within the next seven hours is affected.

The "Honeymoon's Over" Shit
This is any shit created in the presence of another person.

The Groaner
A shit so huge it cannot exit without vocal assistance.

The Floater
Characterized by its floatability, this shit has been known to resurface after many flushings.

The Ranger
A shit which refuses to let go. It is usually necessary to engage in a rocking or bouncing motion, but quite often the only solution is to push it away with a small piece of toilet paper.

The Phantom Shit
This appears in the toilet mysteriously and no one will admit to putting it there.

The Peek-A-Boo Shit
Now you see it, now you don't. This shit is playing games with you. Requires patience and muscle control.

The Bombshell
A shit that comes as a complete surprise at a time that is either inappropriate to shit (i.e. during lovemaking or a root canal) or you are nowhere near shitting facilities.

The Snake Charmer
A long skinny shit which has managed to coil itself into a frightening position - usually harmless.

The Olympic Shit
This shit occurs exactly one hour prior to the start of any competitive event in which you are entered and bears a close resemblance to the Drinker's Shit.

The Back-To-Nature Shit
This shit may be of any variety but is always deposited either in the woods or while hiding behind the passenger side of your car.

The Pebbles-From-Heaven Shit
An adorable collection of small turds in a cluster, often a gift from God when you actually can't shit.

Premeditated Shit
Laxative induced. Doesn't count.

Shitzopherenia
Fear of shitting - can be fatal!

Energizer Vs. Duracell Shit
Also known as a "Still Going" shit.

The Power Dump Shit
The kind that comes out so fast, you barely get your pants down when you're done.

The Liquid Plumber Shit
This kind of shit is so big it plugs up the toilet and it overflows all over the floor. (You should have followed the advice from the Lincoln Log Shit.)

The Spinal Tap Shit
The kind of shit that hurts so much coming out, you'd swear it's got to be coming out sideways.

The "I Think I'm Giving Birth Through My Asshole" Shit
Similar to the Lincoln Log and The Spinal Tap Shits. The shape and size of the turd resembles a tall boy beer can. Vacuous air space remains in the rectum for some time afterwards.

The Porridge Shit
The type that comes out like toothpaste, and just keeps on coming. You have two choices: a) flush and keep going, or b) risk it piling up to your butt while you sit there helpless.

The "I'm Going To Chew My Food Better" Shit
When the bag of Doritos you ate last night lacerates the insides of your rectum on the way out in the morning.

The "I Think I'm Turning Into A Bunny" Shit
When you drop lots of cute, little round ones that look like marbles and make tiny splashing sounds when they hit the water.

The "What The Hell Died In Here?" Shit
Also sometimes referred to as "The Toxic Dump". Of course you don't warn anyone of the poisonous bathroom odour. Instead, you stand innocently near the door and enjoy the show as they run out gagging and gasping for air.

The "I Just Know There's A Turd Still Dangling There" Shit
Where you just sit there patiently and wait for the last cling-on to drop off because if you wipe now, it's going to smear all over the place.

Skanky lead singer of the Black Eyed Peas formerly in the girl group Wild Orchid.

The only American Idol winner who really had major success, probably because she puts out the best songs of them all.

One of the coolest states around. Located in the upper midwest north of Illinois, east of MN and IA and west and south of Michigan.

In Wisconsin you'll find everything from city life in Milwaukee, Racine, Kenosha, Madison and Green Bay.

Milwaukee is a diverse city famous for its festivals such as Summerfest, Germanfest, Pridefest, Festa Italiana and more. Milwaukee is also known for its beer, the Milwaukee Brewers, the Milwaukee Bucks and the Wisconsin State Fair in West Allis.

Racine (just south of Milwaukee) is home to SC Johnson Wax, lots of shopping and recreation and the beautiful Wind Point area.

Kenosha is home to outlet shopping, electric street cars (a must see for any rail fans), fun yet free lakeshore events and a beautiful lakeshore.

Madison is the capital city. It's also a very well known party city and a great place to shop (State street)

Green Bay is best known for one of the most known football teams in the NFL, the Green Bay Packers.

Other smaller cities in Wisconsin include Wausau (great skiing can be found here at Rib Mountain), La Crosse, Eau Claire, Sheboygan, Oshkosh, and Fond Du Lac.

Wisconsin is nicknamed "America's Dairyland" Much of Wisconsin consists of farming in particular dairy farming. A large amount of America's cheese is produced here. Most counties in Wisconsin have a yearly event called a "Dairy Breakfast" where a dairy farm hosts a breakfast with food, milk/dairy and other fun stuff.

The Baraboo/Dells area is a popular tourest attraction for people from all over. It includes many cool attractions and beautiful sights.

Wisconsin is home to a large amount of German and Polish people which makes Polka music a Wisconsin favorite. More polka can be found on the radio and in other places in Wisconsin then anywhere else in the county.

Hunting is a popular recreation in Wisconsin. People will often head "up nort" for the weekend to areas such as the UP Of Michigan, Crivitz, etc for weekend camping and hunting.

In the Milwaukee area, "pop" is called "Soda"

In Wisconsin, water fountains are often called "bubblers"

Wisconsin's sports teams include Green Bay Packers (NFL), Milwaukee Brewers (MLB), Milwaukee Bucks (NBA), Wisconsin Badgers (College)

Bands/Artists from Wisconsin Include: The Bodeans, Violent Femmes, Garbage, Steve Miller, INOJ, Citizen King & more.

Class that the government forces on everybody so you don't get fat. It is basically a legal way for the school to abuse students by forcing them to do excercises, wear really crappy clothes and play sports and get hit in the head with the balls that the sports are played with. The gym teachers are usually overhyped bullies and just plain mean.

Adaptive PE is the class that they put the disabled kids in wheelchairs (Some can't see or hear) and force them to play sports. If you are in the adaptive PE class and are not disabled in any way other then ADD or mild autism, you will get talked down on by both the teacher and the student helpers. In adapted PE, the teacher really hates you and wishes she or he could smack your face in but forces themselfs to act all nice and calm.

Someone needs to ban PE for good for the health of students. There are more injuries in PE class then any other class in a school.

1. A plan that's simple.

2. A band from Canada responsible for hits like "I'm Just A Kid", "I'd Do Anything", "Addicted", "Perfect", "Shut Up", "Welcome To My Life" and "Untitled" (Which has a drunk driving themed video) Well hated by people who think its not "real" or "quality" music

A load of brainwashing money grabbing crap. A religion that goes around teaching crap and harassing people who disagree with them. They are liars and cheats. You can tell these people are lying just by looking at their face while they're talking.