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illigalisam by anonymous October 16, 2020
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Urban Dictionary
Femcel
There are two types of femcels. One is nice, the other is toxic. Here's how to tell the difference:
Nice femcel: Is polite, doesn't get out much, might struggle financially/professionally (living with her parents after her 21st birthday, hard time finding a job where she fits her role), has a hard time making friends (generally doesn't like to bother people and might be shy/timid), is quiet, might have some form of autism, generally have depression, and blames herself for her problems. Generally average or slightly above average in appearence/intelligence This type is rare.
Toxic femcel: This is the most common type of femcel. They usually have short hair greasy hairt that's dyed bright colors, hate men simply for existing, blame the "patriarchy" for their personal problems instead of taking responsibility, they are VERY rude/entitled (so they act like Karens), have low IQs, smell bad (due to bad hygiene and their cats pissing/shitting everywhere), usually have 20 cats, never wear bras because they think bras somehow support the "patriarchy", and never get rid of that disgusting armpit hair or leg hair. They are generally below average to freakishly ugly when it comes to looks, and are incredibly dumb. Their personalities are atrocious.
Nice femcel: Is polite, doesn't get out much, might struggle financially/professionally (living with her parents after her 21st birthday, hard time finding a job where she fits her role), has a hard time making friends (generally doesn't like to bother people and might be shy/timid), is quiet, might have some form of autism, generally have depression, and blames herself for her problems. Generally average or slightly above average in appearence/intelligence This type is rare.
Toxic femcel: This is the most common type of femcel. They usually have short hair greasy hairt that's dyed bright colors, hate men simply for existing, blame the "patriarchy" for their personal problems instead of taking responsibility, they are VERY rude/entitled (so they act like Karens), have low IQs, smell bad (due to bad hygiene and their cats pissing/shitting everywhere), usually have 20 cats, never wear bras because they think bras somehow support the "patriarchy", and never get rid of that disgusting armpit hair or leg hair. They are generally below average to freakishly ugly when it comes to looks, and are incredibly dumb. Their personalities are atrocious.
Me: God, I must be a femcel, I still live with my parents at 22, can't find a job that sticks, and don't really have friends. It's all my fault.
Karen: You still live with your dad? I wish all men would fucking die!
Me: Go away Karen. The fact that you want all men to die is disgusting, plus you reek of cat piss, cat shit, sweat, used maxi pads, and a yeast infection, which is equally disgusting. Seriously, when was the last time you took a shower and did laundry?
Karen: Bathing and laundry were made up by the patriarchy! I haven't bathed or done laundry since I was 18!
Me: You mean to tell me that you haven't bathed or done laundry in almost a decade? How the actual fuck are you still alive and not dying of multiple infections?!?
Karen: Infections were made up by men so they had an excuse to objectify women!
Me: What the fuck kind of logic is that?
Karen: Stop asking me questions or I'm going to kick your ass!
Me: Really? I grew up as the only daughter and my parents had 4 sons. The fact that you think you can take me in a fight is hilarious!
Karen: Fuck you! (Tries to punch me)
Me: (Dodges, then knocks her out with one punch) Go fuck yourself.
Karen: You still live with your dad? I wish all men would fucking die!
Me: Go away Karen. The fact that you want all men to die is disgusting, plus you reek of cat piss, cat shit, sweat, used maxi pads, and a yeast infection, which is equally disgusting. Seriously, when was the last time you took a shower and did laundry?
Karen: Bathing and laundry were made up by the patriarchy! I haven't bathed or done laundry since I was 18!
Me: You mean to tell me that you haven't bathed or done laundry in almost a decade? How the actual fuck are you still alive and not dying of multiple infections?!?
Karen: Infections were made up by men so they had an excuse to objectify women!
Me: What the fuck kind of logic is that?
Karen: Stop asking me questions or I'm going to kick your ass!
Me: Really? I grew up as the only daughter and my parents had 4 sons. The fact that you think you can take me in a fight is hilarious!
Karen: Fuck you! (Tries to punch me)
Me: (Dodges, then knocks her out with one punch) Go fuck yourself.
Femcel by Failurebitch March 7, 2025
gashmat
Shreveport Side Pocket
DEEP in the south where any hole will do, there are “special” pros that will take out the apparatus holding their colostomy bag in place and let you use the hole in their stomach.
For a nominal fee of course!
For a nominal fee of course!
Goodtime Gretchen: Hey doc! Can you swab my hole? I think I’ve got another STD.
Doc: Ok, please remove your pants.
Gretchen (lifting her shirt): Not down there! They pay more money at the Crawdad Saloon for this hole!!
Doc: That Shreveport Side Pocket is paying the note on that double shotgun!
Doc: Ok, please remove your pants.
Gretchen (lifting her shirt): Not down there! They pay more money at the Crawdad Saloon for this hole!!
Doc: That Shreveport Side Pocket is paying the note on that double shotgun!
Shreveport Side Pocket by Alabama Crawdangle August 10, 2022
Tommy
Most often a white man with a very large penis ranging from 6.5 - 8.5 inches. While the individual may or may not realize it he is such a stud that women and a few men find him to be irresistible and would do thing for and with him they normally wouldn't do. While a Thomas may be a nice guy on the outside they are a freakin' stud in bed and drive women wild.
Tommy by Sarah Stevens February 12, 2010