turd polish

to spin, embellish, spin, puff, enhance, enrich, exaggerate, gild and generally lie like a motherfucker about something to make it seem better and more desirable than it really is

you: "man, you should have seen the girl I fucked last night. she was smokin' hot and craving my johnson juice."
me: "what a load of turd polish asswipe. I did see her. what a toothless skank whore."
you: "well, you can't have everything."
me: "well, i guess it is better than nothing. what's her number?"

Conventional Wisdom:
"you can polish a turd, but it's still a piece of shit."

by spiderbesideher September 24, 2009

turd polish

turd polish the act of applying nice things to somthing that is a peice of crap in order to hide the fact it is a turd

tom bought a crappy car so puts {turd polish} spinners on it.

by sonicwarhawk December 9, 2005

You can't polish a turd

You can't make something that's not naturally good great even with the hardest attempts.

"After years, he's just never going to change his selfish ways." "Well, you can't polish a turd!!"

by SarcasticSeminar101 August 3, 2015

Can't polish a turd

Despite your best efforts, there are some things you just can't fix/improve.

To point out futile attempts to conceal/change the baisc nature of something.

1) Joe: Danny's back in town. He lost a bunch of weight, got a nose job, got hair plugs and now wears really flashy clothes but he's still one ugly motherfucker.

Jim: Well, you can't polish a turd.

2) The comb-over hairstyle

by henryj May 12, 2006

polish a turd

To attempt to put a positive spin or light on something that is clearly shit.

Polish the turd all you want- that movie still sucks.

by MaHaBone January 29, 2004

you can't polish a turd

trying to "fix up" a junky car.it cannot be done, give it up!

nathan, sell that cavi!you can't polish a turd!

by da trick biatch December 21, 2005

you can't polish a turd

to try to "fix up" an ugly car, or to try to turn a compact rice burner into a race car.

i told that guy trying to pimp a cavi, "you can't polish a turd"

by da trick biatch December 28, 2005