n. sweaty, disgusting masturbation. usually occurring immediately after exercising, working, or being outside in the heat. Becoming aroused due to being outside around bikini-clad women and having to relieve oneself immediately in the poolhouse bathroom.
After going for a three mile jog in mid-June, Stanley came back inside and did a swampjack.
Bill: Stan, what the hell are you doing on my laptop?
Stanley: A swampjack.
Bill: Stan, what the hell are you doing on my laptop?
Stanley: A swampjack.
by ColombianSkyhawk July 09, 2011
A variation on the common Redneck
A swampjack is the wetland version of a hillbilly, but instead of living in the mountains hunting and scaring tourists, they live in the swamps and prefer fishing and noodling. These are the folk you see sitting on a stump in the middle of a marsh with a shotgun, telling lost tourists they way to wherever is "back the way you came". They're most likely going to be driving a white Ford F-150 with a Salt-Life sticker on the rear window.
These guys can be found mostly in the Gulf Coast states like Florida and Mississippi, and are not to be confused with Bayou folk in Louisiana.
A swampjack is the wetland version of a hillbilly, but instead of living in the mountains hunting and scaring tourists, they live in the swamps and prefer fishing and noodling. These are the folk you see sitting on a stump in the middle of a marsh with a shotgun, telling lost tourists they way to wherever is "back the way you came". They're most likely going to be driving a white Ford F-150 with a Salt-Life sticker on the rear window.
These guys can be found mostly in the Gulf Coast states like Florida and Mississippi, and are not to be confused with Bayou folk in Louisiana.
Look at that guy in the gas station wearing nothing but blue jeans and no shoes, the absolute swampjack.
by MotherHubber May 06, 2021