Skip to main content

south paw monkey spanker

One who uses his left hand to jack, whack, choke the chicken, spank the monkey, attack the one-eyed purple-headed warrior or in other words, MASTURBATE!

A lefty, per say

May be a person that writes, hits, or even smokes with his right hand but gallops the old lizzard with his left hand.

Also referred to as an S.P.M.P.
Kristine: So I used my teloscope last night and looked into Ray's window. Did you know that he is a South Paw Monkey Spanker?

Derek: So I applied for this new job at the Home Depot, and my boss wanted to know if I was an S.P.M.P. and I'm all wtf? On occasion, though, I do, do the five kunckle shuffle with 'ol Lefty!

Janet: Hey Bobby?
Bobby: Yes Janet?
Janet: Do you participate in genital stimulation via phallengetic motion with your left hand?
Bobby: Why yes, I am an S.P.M.P.!
south paw monkey spanker mug front
Get the south paw monkey spanker mug.
See more merch
Sonion comes from a GIF that is a mix of the word son and onion ( if you use this slang you like dih)
Man 1 says "I drank last night I need a break" Man 2 "Sonion"
Sonion by popularloner67 March 11, 2026
Word of the Day on June 4, 2026

breatharian 

One whos diet consists of air, light, and prana, with a possible sip of water now and then.
The breatharian has air, light, and prana for food.
breatharian by leena gabor November 8, 2005
Word of the Day on June 3, 2026

A Booger In The Nose Of Progress 

Anything that impedes or otherwise interferes with a process going forward.
"Militarily, that inquest was a booger in the nose of progress."

or

"As far as human rights are concerned, this political infighting is a booger in the nose of progress."
Word of the Day on June 2, 2026

🤡🫵🏻

How to say "you're an idiot/clown" using only emojis.
Person 1: Insert completely incorrect and/or idiotic statement here
Person 2: 🤡🫵🏻
Word of the Day on June 1, 2026
Fogey/fogy /fougi/ sl. (early 18C+, orig. Scot) old-fashioned, stuck-in-the mud.
Person with old fashioned ideas which he is unwilling to change: Come to the disco and stop being such an old fogey!
You think me an old fogeyand an old tory, his thoughtful voice said. I saw three generations since O’Connel’s time. I remember the famine. Do you know that the orange lodges agitated for repeal of the union twenty years before O’Connel did or before the prelates of your communion denounced him as a demagogue? You fenians forget some things. (James Joyce, Ulysses. Penguin Books,1992. p. 38)
fogey by Petyush September 14, 2005
Word of the Day on May 31, 2026
Add a tablespoon of jarlic to two teaspoons of butter and spread it in bread to make garlic bread
Jarlic by YSAC fanboy June 6, 2020
Word of the Day on May 30, 2026