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shitpist 

When you simultaneously shit and piss yourself while looking at reddit or tumblr. Is usually caused by laughing.
"Bro, i was looking at reddit on the train, and i totally shitpisted bro!"
shitpist by Pseu. D. Onym September 30, 2020
Urban Dictionary Merch

shitistics 

calculating the mass of someones life time shit production based on their diet and health
Well... I know a man his age (76) should have produced about 24,320lbs (11,030 kg) of shit in his lifetime so far. If we convert those 76 years into days we have 27759 days. Now it is normal and healthy to have a bowel movement anywhere between three times a week to three times a day, but my dad always ate dinner at the same time and used the bathroom approximately once a day. Therefore we can conclude that he has shat approximately 27759 times in his lifetime, maybe a little less or a little more. If we divide those 24,320lbs he has dropped in his lifetime with the days he has lived, we should get 0,87lbs which is 0,39kg and therefore we can take a guess and say that his last shit weighted about 0,87 pounds or 0,39kg. Now the average weight of a human log is around 1/4 of a pound to 1 pound (or 0,11kg to 0,45kg). With this information we can tell that the turd was a little on the skinny side but he is healthy and probably doing well. This is shitistics.
shitistics by wanwanwan September 21, 2022
A post of little to no sincere insightful substance. Especially a "shit"(low)-effort/quality-post with the sole purpose to confuse, provoke, entertain or otherwise evoke an unproductive reaction. Often exemplified in surreal out-of-context posts.

Shitposts can be many things including memes, spam, and bait - but rarely vice-versa.
Unlike memes, shitposts have no template.
Unlike spam, shitposts don't need repetition.
Unlike bait, shitposts aren't designed for response.
Why does this image of a possum with a gun say "triangle"?
You wouldn't get it. It's just a shitpost.
Shitpost by got1837 February 8, 2021

shittist 

A religion with the beliefs that all things were created from shit. And this thing called shit broke off into smaller pieces of shit to form galaxies and planets. Shit was created by the supreme turd Duda'h (The Mighty Doo Doo Turd)and its worshippers read from The Book of Duda'h about the awesome powers of the shit-turd. The Book of Duda'h teaches that The Mighty Doo Doo Turd communicated to chosen people through what is called a "Hawning" where The Mighty Doo Doo Turd births himself into living form in a host during defecation. Those people who do not believe in the powers of The Mighty Doo Doo Turd are anti-shittists.
The Shittist religion is the only true religion!!!!!!!!! All praise due to The Mighty Doo Doo Turd.
shittist by Mr. Dwayne June 15, 2008

shitp0stng 

Always speak facts 😻 you can't not love them
Do you know who shitp0stng is??
Yes, they are amazing!
shitp0stng by g.host1 July 6, 2021
1. (noun) any content on the internet whose humor derives from its surreal nature and/or its lack of clear context. Differs from a meme: whereas a meme's humor comes from its repeatability, a shitpost is funny simply because it isn't a predictable repetition of an existing form. Shitposts can become memes, but memes cannot become shitposts.
2. (verb) to create such a post

A person who shitposts is known as a shitposter
1: did you see that shitpost on my tumblr this morning?
2: no, i hate shitposting
Shitpost by MaddieHue May 2, 2018
To make utterly worthless and inane posts on an internet messageboard.
This guy loves to shitpost all over the forums. Look at this crap:

TrevorReznick> my posts are only 5.22% of the total posts on this forum
shitpost by jarrynkell July 23, 2008
More from Urban Dictionary

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Dante: "I wish I could be Nigerian, but I can't because I'm Chinese. You met me at a very Chinese time in my life."
Word of the Day on September 25, 2026
Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.

Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.

Modified derivative of granola.
"I need more crunchy guys in my life. I'm so tired of dating preppy metrosexual assholes."

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crunchy by EBC July 11, 2007
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murderhobo 

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The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.
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DM: You murderhobos disgust me.
murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021
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A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.
"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."
Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020
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Todd: He's just a concrete cowboy.
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