screen wank 

The action required to scroll through a long list on a touch phone / tablet.

You'll need to screen wank to get to the bottom one.

screen wank by vtraveller September 13, 2013

Split Screen Reality Wank

When you have a wank over someone you know who looks like an actress in a porn film. You split your screen to show the woman you know on one side of the screen (perhaps a Facebook photo) and the porn video with actress who looks like her on the opposite side.

Brian: "You coming down the pub mate?"
John: "Nah, having a split screen reality wank mate."
Brian: "What's that?"
John: "Found a pornstar that looks like your sister mate, will load that up while looking at your sisters profile picture."
Brian: "You're a sick fuck mate."

Split Screen Reality Wank by Jimmy Peters August 5, 2016