Remism
Remism is the religion in which the beliefs revolve solely around
unicorn foetus tears.
It was discovered in the late 13th century, when Remmy McRem drank some
unicorn foetus tears and miraculously became disabled.
He shrank from 6 ft 3 to 3ft 5, and could not, no matter how
hard he tried, stop his tongue from hanging outta his mouth
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESHT is the mantra which Remists repeat over and over when meditating.
In the annual holiday of Remmadan, the religious dish of Raisingreenscrote is eaten whilst grating Shaze. Afterwards, Remists play a game called
brown the mince.
They take it in turns to snort bits of raw meat through a straw – the winner gets to
eat some
cabbage dipped in
unicorn foetus tears.
Presents can be given on this holiday, which goes back to when Remmy McRem was given an alpaka called Gary to ride to his auntie's brothel to get some soup because he couldn't cook because he was disabled REMember.
There once was a man named Remmy,
Who woke up and he had a semi,
He played with his
chode,
then he shot his load,
And fed it to the children from Denny.
This is holy scripture of Remists, they read it every tuesday which is known as Remday. Between the hours of 3pm and 7pm.
"I
met this Remist the other day, he was riding his alpaka
well fast! I heard him doing his mantras too, all like - 'WHEEEEEEEEEEEESHT' 'n' shit" Remism is hilare.
