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Poosterbation

Poosterbation or, to poosterbate, is to perform the act of masturbation while using shit as lubricant. It is most commonly performed when a person wants to bust a nut, and needs to lay a cable at the same time. A variation of poosterbation would be to use shit other than your own, this form of poosterbation is very adventurous and usually requires a level of poosterbation experience to maintain a boner as other peoples shit always smells worse than your own.

There is a high risk of infection associated with performing poosterbation with strangers shit, because you can never be sure as to what bacteria or diseases might be lurking in their poo. The most common form of infection from poosterbation is Broccoli Cock (see 'Broccoli Cock'). AIDS is a low risk due to the rancid smell of AIDS infected poo, and the high availability of AIDS rags (see 'AIDS rag') from public hospitals.
A guy and girl leave the club and sneak into the back alley together,

Guy-"I've gotta fuck you real quick cause my girlfriend will be wondering where I am".

Girl-"Have you got a condom?, cause I have AIDS"

Guy-"FUCK, no I don't, but I have an AIDS rag, quick just do a shit and wipe the poo with this AIDS rag, then I'll just poosterbate into your mouth".

Girl-"OK, I love poosterbation".

Guy-"No shit bitch, everyone loves poosterbation".
by Spydabytes September 10, 2010
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poopsterbating

Jill was appalled when she caught her boyfriend poopsterbating in the bathroom.
by Apolloss March 2, 2014
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Poopturbation

1. The act of yo-yoing a turd in and out your kiester.

2. A person that simply cannot pass a turd in the street without molesting it. (“Fecalfelliac” or “poop loopy”)
1. The exercises really paid off, I can do a half hour long session of poopturbation, and as of last week, I no longer have to use my hands. But I still do.

2. “You wouldn’t believe what I almost stepped in, and ended up making love to.”
by Swamy swimwamlitts June 21, 2019
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Poosturbating

To masturbate while pooping, simple right?
Alex said he just had to take a dump but we know he was poosturbating since Courtney just bent over.
by Cheatachu April 2, 2008
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Poopsturbation

The act of grabbing a crock of shit and using it as lubricant while polishing the rusty handle (aka jacking off). Not for the faint hearted. Widely practiced in Germany.
Jacking off old school is nice and all, but poopsturbation gets me off in seconds!
by ein Kackspieler November 5, 2010
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posturbation

also: Posturbating

'liking' or 'upping' your own posts.
If you have to like or up your own post, it's posturbation, and you probably should have kept it to yourself anyway.
by pteryakisan October 30, 2013
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pussterbation

pussterbation - An unnecessary term meaning vaginal masturbation. Portmanteau of pussy and masturbation.
Yesterday my mom asked me if I had discovered the joys of pussterbation.
by anklepain9000 July 12, 2010
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