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masturprocrastibate 

When you delay taking care of work, and other important things you should be doing, by masturbating furiously, desperately, to kill the pain of your failure and shame at being so useless.
"I was supposed to finish closing like 25 insurance claims cases that I'm behind on this weekend, along with cleaning my house, and those god damn gutters, so I freaked the fuck out and had to masturprocrastibate literally all weekend until my semen smelled like bleach. When I was done herkin jerkin, I was both ashamed and...proud of myself.
masturprocrastibate by cadeuceus September 18, 2018

MasturProcrastination 

The act of masturbating when you have run out of things to do while procrastinating.
I decided masturprocrastination would be more fun that reading Shakespeare.

masturprocrastinating

For the masters of procrastination. Absolutely excessive procrastination that is just sad and unnecessary. A person will strive to procrastinate as long as they can, usually aware of the fact that there are other things to be done but also usually not giving a shite.
1. I've been masturprocrastinating all evening and spending hours watching Lady Gaga and Gwen Stefani videos... No- Of course I haven't written that paper yet!

2. Paul P Bungle is the masturprocrastinator- He is also a goo baby.

3. Let's masturprocrastinate, shall we?
More from Urban Dictionary
Being ignored by someone when making a statement or asking a question. Also known as blanked and turfed.
Person 1: Did u watch ** last nite?
Person 2:......
Person 3: O no u got aired!
aired by Pietro February 9, 2005
Word of the Day on October 10, 2026

piddlefart

Instead of doing my homework, I decided to piddlefart around for two hours.
piddlefart by Rene April 25, 2005
Word of the Day on October 9, 2026
anyone who succeeds in disgracing/over indulging themselves in the throws of clubland
28 hours and 4 clubs later, gurning for england but still refusing to go home - a total wrongun!!
wrongun by bevvers March 21, 2007
Word of the Day on October 8, 2026

square grouper

Nickname given to bales of marijuana thrown overboard or out of airplanes. Origin is reportedly from members of the US Coast Guard in the area of Southern Florida.
"Base we've got some square groupers floating outside of Miami harbor."
square grouper by slipsheet November 6, 2004
Word of the Day on October 7, 2026
A girl who does ballet and only talks about ballet. Her schedule is filled with dance classes which does not allow her to do any other activity.
"Hey, do you know that girl Sally?"

"Yeah, she's kind of annoying. All she ever talks about it ballet."

"Wow, what a Bunhead."

"Hey Sally, you want to hang out this weekend?"
"I can't, I have dance."
"You're such a Bunhead."

"Yeah... I know."
Bunhead by Jen00 October 24, 2014
Word of the Day on October 6, 2026
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