jackycardia 

When you're hospitalized and hooked up to a heart monitor and start jacking off and your heart rate rises to the point where hospital staff is called in thinking you're having a cardiac event only to discover you're just jacking off. A portmanteau of jacking off and tachycardia.

I had to check up on the patient because his heart rate was through the roof but it turned out to just be jackycardia.

jackycardia by noire233 November 28, 2021

tackycardia 

A disorder characterized by one having the affinity to give too many overly-tacky holiday cards.

The last 3 Christmases, Jon sent me and everyone in the family a card which was composed of little more than the words "Ho,Ho,Ho." It is apparent that he suffers from tackycardia.

tackycardia by aquajerk/surly December 26, 2011

jacktardian 

Related to being or acting like a jackass retard.

Don't be a jacktardian ass clown and do something really stupid.

jacktardian by TazTalksYouListen September 17, 2019