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Grown-up
Some people mistakenly believe this is a term for those over 18. Fraid not. Some people are born grown-ups, and some die at 100 never having acheived this status. If you are one, congratulations on not dying thus far; if not, here's some things you have to look forward to!
• You will cease to be impressed with your 1337speak, pwning people, your h4x0r rep and otherwise talking "liek u r" an illiterate moron. Intelligence, it's not just for breakfast anymore.
• For you emo kids, the world will get brighter for you when you stop crying and get another piece of ass. Life's cyclical in nature, roll with it.
• You will finally understand why your dad always screams when you begin to pay all your own bills. TIP: Pay electricity bill before buying the new GTA.
• Realizing that just because you CAN drink doesn't necessarily make it a good idea. Go out Wednesday, your place of employment might look like the jaws of Hell Thursday morning at 7:00 AM.
• Realizing that your place of employment ALWAYS looks like the jaws of Hell, shrugging and doing what you damn well feel like anyway.
and finally,
• The moment when you are truly no longer a kid, because you can't be. Because you have decided that all kids, without exception, SUCK. Because now YOU have a kid, crying, yelling, wetting the bed, wanting money. Karma's a cruel bitch.
Other than that, it's the only way to be... what else ya gonna do, be a 40 year old skateboarder?
• You will cease to be impressed with your 1337speak, pwning people, your h4x0r rep and otherwise talking "liek u r" an illiterate moron. Intelligence, it's not just for breakfast anymore.
• For you emo kids, the world will get brighter for you when you stop crying and get another piece of ass. Life's cyclical in nature, roll with it.
• You will finally understand why your dad always screams when you begin to pay all your own bills. TIP: Pay electricity bill before buying the new GTA.
• Realizing that just because you CAN drink doesn't necessarily make it a good idea. Go out Wednesday, your place of employment might look like the jaws of Hell Thursday morning at 7:00 AM.
• Realizing that your place of employment ALWAYS looks like the jaws of Hell, shrugging and doing what you damn well feel like anyway.
and finally,
• The moment when you are truly no longer a kid, because you can't be. Because you have decided that all kids, without exception, SUCK. Because now YOU have a kid, crying, yelling, wetting the bed, wanting money. Karma's a cruel bitch.
Other than that, it's the only way to be... what else ya gonna do, be a 40 year old skateboarder?
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grown-up headache by D. Fox January 5, 2010