golden gopher 

WHen you're fucking a chick doggie style, and you start nawing on her back, and you piss inside of her.

Since I couldn't piss into my loafer, I gave dat chick a golden gopher.

golden gopher by ade2 December 5, 2007

golden gopher 

When a dude with a 2" pencil dick creams his shorts moments before scoring with a hot chick.

My dickhead neighbor was ready to commence a threesome with Sophia Vargara and Jessica Biel when he Golden Gophered down his leg,

golden gopher by GopherHaze May 12, 2016

golden gopher 

Verb; to cover a height challenged or little person in succulent soil while they are perspiring profusely and then urinate on them to wash them clean

After a long day at the construction site and pinched for time, Brian sought out a friend to give him a golden gopher, so he could get home before his wife found out about his extra curricular activities

golden gopher by David Gary David June 19, 2018

Golden Gophered 

Failing to deliver a shit in the toilet.

The Shit keeps poking its little head out but crawls back up into its hole.

I went to the bathroom, but I got Golden Gophered.

Spent 20 minutes on the can, but I was Golden Gophered.

Golden Gophered by DSeanK January 28, 2015