glove job
The act of yanking a man's cock while wearing boxing gloves.
This largely unrecognized and under-appreciated variation of a handjob was initially practiced in the middle ages. Historians postulate the glove was a preventative measure practiced by dukes, earls, and serfs alike who would coerce lepors with low self-esteem to choke the chicken. The glove was required because it was believed that leprosy was transmitted via human contact.
**UPDATE**
In March of 2020 the glove job reentered public consciousness due to CDC finding that the SARS-2, CoVid-19 virus was most easily spread via hand-genital contact. Early studies indicate 56% of North Americans over the age of 18 have participated in 1-5 glove jobs while 44% 6 or greater. 86% of adults have reported engaging in masturbatory glove jobs because they saw a Facebook post about President Trump mentioning the glove job's effectiveness in halting the spread of the virus.
Of note, the dramatic uptick in glove jobs resulted in early PPE shortages across the continent and did not abate until 13 year old, Henry Wilkins, began experimenting with condoms ("To practice for the real thing."), and realized what we as a society had known all along, that is, that the condom IS the glove. His Youtube rant went viral and the PPE shortage suddenly disappeared. A statue of Henry, presented in the moment of his epiphany, was erected in front of numerous CoVid-19 care facilities. He will no doubt be a national hero for decades to cum.
This largely unrecognized and under-appreciated variation of a handjob was initially practiced in the middle ages. Historians postulate the glove was a preventative measure practiced by dukes, earls, and serfs alike who would coerce lepors with low self-esteem to choke the chicken. The glove was required because it was believed that leprosy was transmitted via human contact.
**UPDATE**
In March of 2020 the glove job reentered public consciousness due to CDC finding that the SARS-2, CoVid-19 virus was most easily spread via hand-genital contact. Early studies indicate 56% of North Americans over the age of 18 have participated in 1-5 glove jobs while 44% 6 or greater. 86% of adults have reported engaging in masturbatory glove jobs because they saw a Facebook post about President Trump mentioning the glove job's effectiveness in halting the spread of the virus.
Of note, the dramatic uptick in glove jobs resulted in early PPE shortages across the continent and did not abate until 13 year old, Henry Wilkins, began experimenting with condoms ("To practice for the real thing."), and realized what we as a society had known all along, that is, that the condom IS the glove. His Youtube rant went viral and the PPE shortage suddenly disappeared. A statue of Henry, presented in the moment of his epiphany, was erected in front of numerous CoVid-19 care facilities. He will no doubt be a national hero for decades to cum.
i went home with this chick last night and noticed she had crazy man hands so i begged for a glove job so i wouldnt be so grossed out
Urban Dictionary Merch