A Faggon Wagon is any vehicle that has been faggonizedby its owner (i.e., turned gay).
Rules of the Faggon Waggon:
1. If you enter this kind of vehicle, be wary of what you may find. Dildos, vibrators, buttplugs, fag mags, and/or fuzzy pillows stuffed with all of the above might be found in a typical Faggon Waggon.
2. Always wear a seatbelt when traveling in a Faggon Waggon. The driver is likely to be listening to his fag
music on his fag audio system while sitting on one of his 'toys', meanwhile not paying attention to the
fucking road! So a little safety wouldn't hurt.
3. Never say anything remotely sexual to the driver. He's likely to say, "Oh shiiit, I just came." This
will distract him and cause a wreck.
4. Don't touch any of the
food in the Faggon Waggon. The owner is on some fad diet and
will throw a bitch fit if you eat his
food. Also it's probably covered in
jizz.
5. As a matter of fact, don't touch anything, since it's all probably covered in
jizz.
6. When riding in the Faggon Waggon, always bring earplugs or maybe an mp3
player so as to drown out that hideous gay-ass noise that continuously plays out of the vehicle's overtly loud speakers. Just don't ask the driver to turn them down, because all he's going to do is
bitch.
How to Spot a Faggon Waggon:
When driving down a highway, hold up a large photo of a penis to the traffic. Owners of Faggon Waggon love teh
cock so much that they
will explode with lust at the site of one, and thus lose control of their vehicle. Therefore, any car that crashes is Faggon Waggon.