Old rotary style desktop telephones used principally today as a discreet weapon in the home. These units have a handhold in the back which adds to superior comfort and control. It has been noted that during successful implementation of this weapon, the unit gives a plesant sounding ring upon collision with the head.
Barry came around the house looking for trouble, so I gave him a taste of the face smashing phone. He ain't comin' round here no more.
Amy: Me and Ryan were smashing face last night, he bled all over me when I accidentally made his lip bleed with my teeth, twice!
Kitty: Was it fun?
Amy: Hell yea! It was the best we've ever had!
Ruler of Lake Titicaca. Rumored to have a bunghole that gets very angry if it does not receive toilet paper. Cornholio the Great is often seen walking around with his shirt over his head and his hands in the air, chanting songs about his power, and his bunghole.
"I am Cornholio! You do not want to face the wrath of my bunghole, for I need TP!"
Butthead: Shut up, Beavis! (uh huh huh huh)
Beavis: Um, okay. (heh heh heh heh).