The reason I have to drive 30 miles to buy liquor. Also the reason I can't buy liquor on Sundays.
I'd love to live in a city not run by Baptists so that I don't have to drive to the ghetto to buy liquor.
by floodland January 10, 2007
Part of a Christian movement relating to protestant Christianity. Baptist emphasise Believers Baptism, ie accepting God as saviour and Lord and being dunked in a pool of water in front of hundreds of people. In the late 1990s, there were about 43 million Baptists worldwide with about 33 million in the United States.

Baptists often form working groups, ie Southern Baptist Alliance, to support each other. There is also a Baptist World Alliance which is chaired by Rev. David Coffey
He is part of the Baptist family
by David Bunce July 27, 2005
A protestant denomination which bileves in a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, through faith and not works. Baptist bileve in baptism by submersion, and they take The Great Commission very seriously.
A person who is a member of the baptist denomination
by UOE October 24, 2007
right-wing christian wackballs who believe the bible is the literal word of god. there are many different kinds of baptist, all claiming that they are the true ones going to heaven, because they believe one minuscule detail that some other kind doesnt, and that other kind is going to hell. pretty messed up, but can be really nice people. don't get that the bible's stories can all be translated metaphorically to represent larger things in life.
Baptist: "well, in the bible, some children are stoned to death because they disobey their orders, so i guess we should all stone jimmy for forgetting to do the kitty litter last night..."
by Al Tyryklyvay July 11, 2008
There are three main variations on Baptist.

1. The well adjusted baptist: Self explanitory. Lacks most of the defining characteristics of the other classes of Baptists. Well adjusted people who are pretty intelligent and usually rather proficiant in debate. In my experience, these people are few and far between. Are also more open minded to issues like gay marriage and abortion.

2. The nearly-hardcore baptist: A watered down version of the hardcore baptist. Are close minded and stupid. Can be found in places similar to Ansley Park in Atlanta. Close minded as all get-out, but they're not the type of people to go bomb a clinic, mainly due to the concern that they might get the blood of a sinner on their khakis.

3. The hardcore baptist: Total fucking retards. Owe more to the backwoods rapist from "Deliverance" than John The Baptist. The type of person who WOULD bomb an abortion clinic. See the film "Jesus Camp" for more info on this class of baptist.
1. A friend of mine is baptist. Doesn't mind that I'm open to all genders, and understands the need for abortion to be legal. He is a well adjusted baptist.

2. The people on my swim team. Reguraly ridicule me for being liberal, and refuse to come into contact with me, as they think I have some disease. They are semi-hardcore baptists.

3. The people who beat me up at a wrestling meet for saying evelution is more convincing than creationism. One of their moms later threatened me, too.
by Mr.knowitall November 3, 2007
Someone who is hardly a fucktard, except in the opinion of actual fucktards {which is a dumb insult in the first place, used typically by emo kids, punk rockers, etc.) who are ignorant about the Christian denomination of The Baptists. We're not as stupid and/or redneckish as you people imply; in fact, the majority of us don't lash out at those who are atheists, until they attack us, of course. In addition, some Baptists may disagree with the Catholics, but we all still love them as brothers and sisters.
If only you people knew what The Baptists are really about. You call us retarded and hate-filled, when you are the ones making hateful accusations against us; what a bunch of hypocrites you all are.
by The Kentucky Yankee March 20, 2005
uptight and anal superstitious people. they want to control what everyone thinks, believes and does. if you're any different you're going to hell.
the baptist is just another cult follower
by eazy-x February 12, 2008