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asscertain 

To research and make sure of some fact or detail regarding someone's behind.
I love kneading a pretty girl's shapely rump wif my hands, so I always claim dat I wanna asscertain some particular feature or quality of her delightful "rear fun bubbles" in order to persuade her to let me feel her up --- this smilingly-stated excuse usually does indeed work, although of course da cute chick always sees through my ruse, gigglingly saying, "Oh, you just wanna SQUEEZE MY BUTT!" :P
asscertain by QuacksO July 24, 2021

asserting dominance 

to assert one's dominance, you must show alpha qualities, and act as a clutch god. you need to show your strength and power over someone else, who you most likely do not appreciate.
person 1: i am very powerful
person 2: are you asserting dominance on me?
person 1: yes

asscaptain 

1. One who takes charge of and dominates asses like a despot.

2. The nemisis of the asspirate. Although their goals are similar they are loathe to share the ass-sea.

3. A man who loves ass-sex, but unlike the asspirate the ass captain in purely homosexual.
1. "I can't believe the way roberto lets mantooth captain his ass like that"

2. Asscaptain McClendon glared at his arch nemesis, the dred asspirate Roberts.
"I'll be damned if I share this eerr ass-ocean yee," exclaimed the insatiable Roberts.
"Then battle for the ass we must!" retorted McClendon.

3. "Man o man do I singularily love to tyranize a man's ass," said the asscaptain.
asscaptain by Matuea October 8, 2006

asscaptain 

1. One who deems it necessary to boss people around for the sake of shameless self-amusement.
2. One who seeks ass of any kind.
3. One who captains the ass.
Brad should stop telling me what to do. I'm sick of him being an asscaptain.
asscaptain by Matt Heston September 2, 2008

Asserting Dominance 

When you take your friend's burrito and eat it and not letting him have it back at any cost.
Teo died attempting asserting dominance, but failed leaving his friend with a tasty burrito.

Assertained 

Someone who was delayed because they were busy sitting on the toilet.
He could not answer the phone because he was temporarily assertained.
Assertained by Tranquillity Base February 8, 2022
More from Urban Dictionary

kinktober 

An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.

Smut Fanfiction
That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.
kinktober by Kinkiest July 12, 2018
Word of the Day on October 30, 2026

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
The number of years you are still sexually active
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022
Word of the Day on October 28, 2026
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.
womp by 175623226 November 3, 2011
Word of the Day on October 27, 2026
When your wife’s boyfriend let you sleep past 8pm 😎😎
Wife’s boyfriend: You have 5 more minutes
Me: Poggers!
Poggers by Just_Charles April 14, 2020
Word of the Day on October 26, 2026
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