Winchester, Ontario 

A small town between Ottawa and Morrisburg,
Population approx. 2,500

If you are fortunate enough to of been born in town its most likely that your surname is Durant, Holmes or Fawcett

The main employer of the town is Ault Foods which is a dairy plant that masks the entire town with a smell of rotten farts that will make you gag & puke much like after eating a meal at the Country Kitchen. The other jobs offered are selling illegal Indian cigarettes, producing & selling Meth or collecting a disability pension.

The town really comes to life at night time after all the stores are closed at 2pm and the sun sets which brings out all the unemployables. Which start their way of funding their habits by stealing anything that isn't chained down in yards or breaking into cars and tool sheds.

The downtown core consits of old crumpling buildings with FOR RENT signs on them owned by citidiot land lords, as any new business that opens is immediatly rejected if isn't owned by a local.

The main hobbies of locals are getting stupidly drunk, complaining about the price of goods and services, having a coffee at Sutton's gossiping about whos cheating on their spouse and reminising about how great the town was 75 years ago.

If you are a resident of Winchester make sure you never associate with anyone from near by Chesterville as Winchesterites believe they are superior over them.

The town also prides itself on having the most people on welfare & disability this side of the St Lawerence!

Ghud dey, we're gonna head'r to Winchester, Ontario to get piss drunk and score some indian smokes lads

Winchester, Ontario by Doc Gray December 22, 2019