Urban Clown 

The Urban Clown (U.C.) is the evil twin of the circus clown. They share physical attributes but differ in behavior. Like circus clowns they wear over-sized, baggy and loud clothing. Instead of white foundation, the U.C. prefers dark colors and facial tattoos. Traditional clowns wear humorous wigs such as bald caps and colored hair. The U.C. prefers to be bald or if hair is present, the U.C. has shaved designs. The circus clown is known for a cone shaped hat while a U.C. utilizes a baseball cap that is never worn the way as intended. An optional head apparel is the “do-rag”that is reminiscent of that of a food service worker. Some prefer a cowl or hood which has no parallel in circus clown culture.

Instead of horns for comic effect, the U.C. clown carries a gun (or "gat") to intimidate and make poor decisions that typically end in incarceration. In lieu of a seltzer water bottle the U.C. carries a 40oz beer to numb their shame of inner and social ignorance.

The U.C. emulates the circus clown with self loathing and public humiliation in hope of seeking the acceptance of others. The U.C. is typically inept, uneducated (by choice) & a coward who’s is not equipped to solve problems with reasoning. Unlike the traditional clown, the U.C. is neither friendly nor approachable thus incapable of bringing joy to children (or sticking around to support and guide those they fathered). Contrary to the circus clown, laughing at their attire or behavior can lead to serious injury and death.

“Dude, stop staring at the urban clown, he is liable to kill us.”

“You urban clowns need to get the fuck outta here, or I’m calling the cops!”

Urban Clown by Mephistophelies October 24, 2012