When you are about to take a shit are are just about to release your load and you have a massive sneeze..This then shoots your poo at an amazing speed plunging straight down into your toilet like a torpedo. This will usually cause large splashes and get your bum wet.
When you have a cold you will most likely experience more than one brown torpedo
when you're holding up your phone and making faces at it, as though you are taking a selfie, but you're really taking a picture of the person across from you or the wall or anything else that seems interesting but you don't want to be caught dead taking a picture of.
This action is often made more convincing by wiggling the eyebrows or opening the mouth, to pretend you're trying to get a Snapchat filter to work.
FRIEND A: "Did you just take a stealthie of me?"
FRIEND B (turning phone around): "no I was just using snapchat's new filter, see?"