A device used to separate an obese individual's ass cheeks. This device is employed during medical procedures such as rectal exams, hernia removal, etc. The device is often equipped with a sprayer that "mists" coconut or other fragrances to make the overwhelming stench bearable.
"Nurse can you hand me the cheekplow. I have several layers of blubber that I need to peel back to get to this guy's anus."
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.