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Ultimate Pelvic Destruction (UPD) 

• Description: Medical condition. A term used to describe the swollen female genitalia or anus after vigorous prolonged coitus with a very well-endowed male. CoPD Antonym; Cod

• Parameters:
o Female will complain about being swollen shut.
o Usually with a very large deposit of male DNA.
o Must meet the following triad:
 Length
 Girth
 And, incredible natural; albeit almost brutal; stamina.
o The female, through combined effort, will have achieved a minimum of 10 vaginal, clitoral, anal (or combined) orgasms. Orgasms achieved from any position; preferably many positions; with an emphasis on deep penetrating thrusts whereby the female aides by thrusting in conjunction with the male.
o Upon completion of the act, the male remains deep in the female until pulsations from male and female cease and the female Kegel muscle releases the male from her grasp.
o Upon withdrawal, the female swells shut, trapping the male deposit for a number of days depending upon the vigorousness of the session, duration, and volume of deposit.

• Adverse medical affects:
o Honeymoon cystitis.
o Development of a hyperactive female libido.
o Swollen, sore vaginal lips for days after (what am I saying??? I want that!)
o The woman is swollen. Urination is problematic.
o Walking for the female, may be an issue.
o May required longer periods of sleep after coitus.
"OMG he FUCKED me so hard he gave me Ultimate Pelvic Destruction (UPD)!

Cock of Pelvic Destruction (CoPD)

• Description: A male endowed with length, girth, and brutal natural stamina that lead to UPD. Not to be confused with Cod (note the small “d” for the small dick).
• Parameters:
o Must be able to bring the female to vast number of orgasms through deep penetrating thrusts with a session of great duration, consisting of many positions.
o Associated female remarks:
 “OMG!”
 “Is that going to fit?”
 “It has its own zip code”
 “How do you walk with that?”
 “Is that a gun in your pocket? Or are you just happy to see me? Followed by: “Honey I just put the gun on the table, that is me” – True story!
• Adverse medical affects:
o Honeymoon cystitis.
o Development of a hyperactive female libido.
o Swollen, sore vaginal lips for days after (what am I saying??? I want that!)
o The woman is swollen to the point where urinating is problematic.
o Walking, for the female, may be an issue.
OMG! You need to try this! His Cock of Pelvic Destruction (CoPD) causes UPD for days! True story!

Cock of Pelvic Destruction (CoPD)

• Description: A male endowed with length, girth, and brutal natural stamina that lead to UPD. Not to be confused with Cod (note the small “d” for the small dick).
• Parameters:
o Must be able to bring the female to vast number of orgasms through deep penetrating thrusts with a session of great duration, consisting of many positions.
o Associated female remarks:
 “OMG!”
 “Is that going to fit?”
 “It has its own zip code”
 “How do you walk with that?”
 “Is that a gun in your pocket? Or are you just happy to see me? Followed by: “Honey I just put the gun on the table, that is me” – True story!
• Adverse medical affects:
o Honeymoon cystitis.
o Development of a hyperactive female libido.
o Swollen, sore vaginal lips for days after (what am I saying??? I want that!)
o The woman is swollen to the point where urinating is problematic.
o Walking, for the female, may be an issue.
OMG! You need to try this! His Cock of Pelvic Destruction (CoPD) causes UPD for days! True story!
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Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.
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Pee Calculus

When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.
I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.
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"The girl is pretty but she corrupt and dutty!"

or, in a positive usage:

"Booya! That freestyle was dutty!"
Dutty by J Hall April 3, 2003
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