Natural Methodist
1. A born again birth control user who excessively claims to be using natural birth control method; and gives TMI about her cycle, her sex life, and her religious beliefs.
2. The natural methodist method is based on a trinity of ideas overshadowed by one all encompassing truth. Firstly, that women ovulate 14 days before menstruation begins, give or take two days. Secondly, that sperm can survive inside a woman for three days. That an egg can only be fertilized within 24 hours of being released from the ovaries.
And lastly, that anyone at work gives a shit.
2. The natural methodist method is based on a trinity of ideas overshadowed by one all encompassing truth. Firstly, that women ovulate 14 days before menstruation begins, give or take two days. Secondly, that sperm can survive inside a woman for three days. That an egg can only be fertilized within 24 hours of being released from the ovaries.
And lastly, that anyone at work gives a shit.
She's a total Natural Methodist; she would have never made it through high school or technical school if she really was using the the rhythm method. I can't eat hard boiled eggs anymore since she told me when she ovulates.
Natural Methodist by floorfly November 21, 2010
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