hedge hog

A man you encourage your daughter to date, wed, or procreate with so you have a hedge fund for your non existent social security. Also known as "Fat F@#$%." Guys that have no other redeeming quality than a paycheck. Also see
"Mr. Collins" from Pride & Prejudice.
I used to be worried about my retirement, until my daughter
found her new hedge hog on e-harmony.

I don't know what I would do without my hedge hog fund... I am so glad I decided to procreate when I was 16, now I can retire at 35.
by floorfly December 01, 2010
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shelf esteem

When someone builds their self esteem from self help books.
My coworker just added Dr. Phil to her shelf esteem library, now everyday at lunch its Dr. P said this Dr. P said that.
by floorfly November 15, 2010
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accountability co-worker

A coworker who tallies up how much money you spend on lattes and lunch, then makes the assumption you must make 10k more than them. When in reality your disposable income is in direct correlation to how many dependents you have not or lack of lexus sized car payment.
Wow, you are drinking another latter... that's the fifth one this week. I am saving up for my kids braces. I wish I could have a latte everyday. "I guess you are my accountability co-worker... You are right I should stop drinking lattes, going out to lunch and taking birth control so I can live your dream lifestyle of fun infertility."
by floorfly November 15, 2010
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salary challenged

Unemployed or when living beyond ones means catches up with oneself.
Qdoba catered their wedding, they are salary challenged.
by floorfly November 15, 2010
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fun infertility

When someone has so many kids they can't support a fun
lifestyle for themselves.
Joe never gets a latte on coffee runs or goes to happy hour; he has fun infertility, he's got to pay child support on all 5 of those kids.
by floorfly November 15, 2010
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Pill-Lattes

When desperate housewives mix Lattes with pain killers to get through their day.
I find Pill-Lattes helps me stay mentally in shape. I take one one skinny sugar free vanilla no foam latte with a hydrocodone then drop the kids off at school, and then I go to book club or the Y until its time to pick the kids back up.
by floorfly November 15, 2010
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lowest common denomination

1. When someone claims to be "Christrian" but has never been in a church and has a vague recollection of the ten commandments, but thinks they are good person.

2. In religion, the lowest common denominator or least common denominator (abbreviated LCD) is the least common multiple of the denomination of a set of vulgar religions. It is the smallest common thought that is a multiple of the denominations.
God hates fags, that's Joseph 3:16, bro... I know I am apart of the lowest common denomination.
by floorfly November 15, 2010
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