The erratic and fan frenzied behavior that ensues when
McDonalds graciously brings back the McRib to the masses. Like a gift from God, this
delectable delight brings both joy and
utter chaos by its presence alone; turning man against his brethren.
Whilst gallivanting around with Laney, Jason saw something that both troubled and
overwhelmed him with an unreserved, and seemingly familiar infatuation. Like a shining beacon of truth, the billboard’s
words touched him like no poet could ever hope to - “The McRib is back!”
The golden arches of glory, once a mere glimmer on the horizon, awoke something inside him he knew to be incorruptible - McRibmania. As if mandated from the heavens, he traversed four lanes of traffic (nearly striking several elderly pedestrians and one small child), keeping steadfast to that ghostly jewel that captivated and enamored his very essence.
“
What the HELL are you doing” screamed Laney, her high-pitched voiced piercing his ears like a verbal blade. Like a tidal wave of emotions, his mind was flooded with feelings of intense fury and remorse.
Jason knew he had faltered, that he made a mistake - a mistake that he needed to rectify forthwith. With one swift motion, as if rehearsed or committed to memory, Jason reached across the passenger seat, threw open the door and kicked the unwelcome transient to the curb. Left in tears and questions, Laney watched her former suitor squeal out of that familiar parking lot. With a sigh of relief and treasure in hand (and partially in mouth), he drove into that uncharted expanse - never questioning his judgment and never looking back.