Matt Cowan 

(n.) A suburban whiteboy from west haven who acts black, but resembles a mole. Listens to way too much Lil Wayne, yet claims he is not "on his dick". He has orange/yellow teeth, but did not eat any cheetos. He enjoys wearing his brother's clothing and shoes, but claims they are his. He also likes to eat all of his friend's food but never gives them any in return. He thinks he is good at parkour, but all he is capable of is jumping fences and rolling in dirt (and doesn't even look cool doing that). He also enjoys wearing the same hoodie for 8 days in a row, yet claiming it was a different one.

(v.) The act of screenwatching and not admitting to it; The act of not admitting anything bad that happens to you; The act of using excuses. i.e. "I swear on my aunt vickie's grave"

Matt Cowan: "So....Stru.." *stretchs out arms* "ya..got any fooood?"

or

Cacioppo: "Cowan wtf why the hell are you watching my screen?"
Cowan: "Yo i swear on my aunt vickie's grave i wasnt screenwatching"

Cacioppo: "Yo paulo a skunk!!"
Paulo: *looks*
Cacioppo: "Oooh! Broke ya neck!"
Paulo: "I didn't even look wtf!"
Cacioppo: "Stop being a cowan."

Matt Cowan by WeAreNotTylerAndStru November 14, 2009