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Lazy Eyed Jones 

A noun - A women with unusual demeanor and unorthodox ways of seducing men. Mostly direct, can be seen sucking face before a formal introduction. Often does not go home alone. May or may not have a super human ability to look in two directions at the same time. Gets what she came for.

A verb - Refers to a violent blitzkrieg attack, usually acted towards men, sexual in nature. Similar to a mugging.
A noun-

Yo dick! do you see that Lazy Eyed Jones over there? Man! I feel sorry for that guy, if he only knew what he was getting himself into.

It looks like Lazy Eyed Jones over there, is just fishing down the line. I'm sure some beer goggled carp will bite.

A verb -

What happened to you last night? You look like you got Lazy Eyed Jones'd.

I couldn't sleep last night, some chick was Lazy Eyed Jones'in my roommate.
Lazy Eyed Jones by GoforGlory April 6, 2011
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countrypolitan 

Term used to describe someone who is a mix of both rural (country) and urban (metropolitan) lifestyles/upbringings. He/she is typically equally comfortable in both settings and is able to seamlessly slip back and forth between the two, appreciating the characteristics of each.
That ol' gal of mine drives the 12 lane freeway during the week and a John Deere on the weekends. She likes opra and the Grand Ol' Opry. I love them countrypolitan women.
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kinktober 

An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.

Smut Fanfiction
That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.
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a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
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person2: ya he was a proper lad
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The number of years you are still sexually active
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022
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A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.
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